New York Daily News scribe Andy Martino has written a game story that speaks for every fan of the 2011 Mets. What it lacks in rhetorical fluency it makes up for in, uh, truth. This isn't an editing error, although it may look that way at first blush. The Mets have reached the summit of suck.

Here's Martino:

Blah blah blah blah rain blah blah blah Niese blah blah Astros blah blah Mets got spanked. Blah blah, 6-1. We really don't know what else to tell you about this one. But we will try:

It was cold and wet at Citi Field, and the Mets flatlined for one minute shy of three hours against one of the worst teams in baseball. Actually, now the Mets (5-12) are worse than Houston—and the rest of the National League—as they slipped below the Astros (6-11). Could there be a less stimulating April ballgame than the one between these sorry opponents? The only appropriate word is blah.

We are not going to tell you much about Jonathon Niese, who was not very interesting. Nor will we say much about the Mets offense. They did nothing, save for a Carlos Beltran home run against Wandy Rodriguez, the lefthander who brought these career road numbers into the game - 5.12 ERA, 1.49 WHIP and 24-39 record - and manhandled the Mets.


They did not simply lose Tuesday night; they were dead. Which leads one to wonder who they can beat, if they can't beat the worst.


Well said.

Pictured: a guy who has the good sense not to be on the Mets.

Mets are officially in last place in National League after losing to lowly Astros at Citi Field [NYDN, h/t Andrew]