A selection of stories from the week we opened a Winnipeg bureau.

What We've Learned From The ESPN Book So Far | A copy of Those Guys Have all the Fun has landed on our desk. We're still picking through it, but we've already learned quite a bit about our colleagues at ESPN. A roundup of the juicy bits we've collected.
MORE ESPN: ESPN Hockey Analyst Broke Down His Wife's Door, Used Racial Slurs, According To Criminal Complaint

Ranking The 10 End-Of-The-Human-Race Scenarios | The Rapture is scheduled for Saturday, and this is roughly the 17th time in my life that all of us were supposed to die according to some kind of vague, medieval prediction. All of these Rapture predictions, of course, are born of hubris. Everyone wants to believe that they will be alive during the most momentous events in human existence — namely, the end of the world and first contact with space aliens. Everyone wants to be a witness to something completely beyond their grasp. That's why you have retards telling you that God is coming for the Big Payback, and why other yahoos go around telling you they got the ol' tractor-beam-and-anal-probe combo platter. (Drew Magary)

"Macho Man" Randy Savage, 1952-2011 | Savage was killed in a car accident on Friday. We take a look back at his not-all-that-bad professional baseball career and dust off a Dead Wrestler of the Week column about his first wife, Miss Elizabeth. Look for the Masked Man's tribute to Macho on Monday.

Waiting For The Gay Superstar | We're so close, people. So so close to current gay athletes coming out (or being outed), and more importantly, close to gay athletes feeling comfortable with being out. But retired athletes, college athletes, journeyman players, front office people, they're not good enough. They foster an atmosphere of acceptance that simply can not and will not exist until 1) a current professional athlete comes out in the middle of his career and 2) that athlete is good. (Barry Petchesky)
RELATED: Everyone In Basketball Is Gay All Of A Sudden | ESPN Radio's Jared Max Comes Out On The Air, With An Assist From Charles Barkley

"We're On A Fucking Roll, Dude": The 1993 Profile Of Lenny Dykstra That Warned Us What Was Coming | You don't often see a contortionist wearing a black leather Red­skins cap in the baccarat pit playing around with $20,000 at 1 a.m. on a Tuesday morning. You stop and watch. Though seated, his body is arced like a swimmer on a starting block, his chin resting on the large oblong table, his face hidden behind two upright cards, a cigarette burning between two fingers. The guy's a south­paw. A single stack of orange chips is piled neatly before him — each one is worth $1,000 here at Resorts in Atlantic City. Baccarat players gen­erally shy away from orange chips, even though baccarat is the elegant game of tuxedos and turbans and high-priced cleavage, the game of James Bond and jet-setters on the French Riviera. (Bruce Buschel)

What It's Like When The Media Circle Their Prey: A Collection Of Jim Tressel/OSU Public Records Requests | Back in March, Yahoo! broke the story that Ohio State football coach Jim Tressel knew his players were selling memorabilia in violation of NCAA regulations eight months before the school claimed it learned of the scheme. A media scrum ensued. A few days later, we sent Ohio State a public records request asking for the public records requests that other reporters have filed this year. Here's what we got. (Luke O'Brien)

Derek Boogaard, The Quintessential Goon | Despite its camcorder quality, this is perhaps the most splendid and endearing highlight of Boogaard's unlikely career, which ended with his death on Friday, at age 28, of unknown causes. Boogaard had almost no hockey skills. He couldn't skate, pass, or shoot, and, as you can see, he couldn't check either. He could do one thing: fight. The clip tells you a lot about Boogaard and why he played the way he did. It tells you even more about how goons make it in hockey and why they're never going away. (Jack Dickey)

A Children's Treasury Of Athletes Breaking Trophies | Pasi Nurminen, goalie coach of Finland's IIHF-winning hockey team, faceplanted with the championship trophy this week (see left). Nurminen isn't alone, though. Watch many athletes who have done the same. (Barry Petchesky)

Rejoice: American Players Are Soccer's New Exploitable Resource | In April, Thomas DiBenedetto, a rich businessman from Boston who somehow emerged from the economic downturn unscathed, bought a controlling interest in AS Roma for around 60 million Euros. Pending approval, he'll be the first foreign majority investor in Serie A. One of his first action items is to sign an American player. Or two. Or three. (Luke O'Brien)

A Week Of Dunks And Hyperbole | All week, playoff dunks—namely: Taj Gibson's, Udonis Haslem's, and Kevin Durant's—have awed us. Now they're going to be cool posters. Both series are tied 1-1 heading into the weekend.


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Editor-in-Chief: A.J. Daulerio | Senior Editor: Tommy Craggs | Writers: Barry Petchesky, Luke O'Brien | Contributing Editor: Drew Magary | Night/Weekend Editor: Brian Hickey | Video Editor: Emma Carmichael | Contributing Artist: Jim Cooke | Intern: Jack Dickey | Video Intern: Kate Shapiro | Moderators: Comment Ninja Squadron