Locked out? LOCKED IN! It's time for America's hardest-hatted working heroes to knock heads, only not to knock heads, because nobody wants Super Bowl MVP Aaron Rodgers to get knocked out of a game (again), right? Here's your Packers-Saints open thread, to go with our semi-cryptic gambling advice and the rest of Deadspin's NFL kickoff coverage.

Drew Magary: "It's here! It's really here! I never thought it would be here, but it's HERE!" READ »

Deadspin/Slate Roundtable: "One day, you're the Iron Man of football; the next day you're in civvies while Kerry Collins, rushed into action, tries to remember which way the end zone is." READ »


Also: A Player's Farewell To The NFL Preseason


Nate Jackson: "I couldn't wink at my teammates. What if I winked and then I got my dick ripped off?" READ »