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Scott Pruitt Nervously Picks Up Walking Pace As Hundreds Of Whooping Cranes Begin Silently Perching Around Him

WASHINGTON—Realizing with a shudder that he was being watched, Environmental Protection Agency administrator Scott Pruitt reportedly picked up his pace while walking home Tuesday as hundreds of whooping cranes began silently perching around him. “Stay calm, Scott, they’re just birds,” said Pruitt, fumbling for his…

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World's Best Smash 4 Player Is Worn Down By Haters And Harassment

For 13 minutes, Gonzalo “Zero” Barrios’ face barely moved. It was the Grand Finals match of a Super Smash Bros. Wii U tournament, and Barrios, the best Smash player in the world, was squaring off against a formidable opponent. A few feet away, Barrios’ bodyguard kept a lookout for a man who’d threatened to be there,…