Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh spoke many words at today’s confirmation hearings. Probably you know this already, but his opening statement, and the responses that followed, were an overlong fever dream, taking surreal detours into calendar hygiene, workouts with some now-legendary Tobin, his own principled virginity, and yearbook editors’ taste for mischief; swerving frequently into Steve Brulean territory; inspiring at turns revulsion, rage, confusion, a small warped kind of pity, and lots of schadenfreude. Anyway, many of the words were “beer.”