It was Jon Gruden's birthday Saturday so ESPN decided to celebrate in a way sure to make everyone involved uncomfortable. There was a Gruden-through-the-ages slideshow. The Washington Redskins cheerleaders brought him a cake. There was half-hearted singing. Gruden mention how he was blushing. Mike Tirico made sure to say "Chucky" about 50 times. The nation cringed.
Tirico also gave Gruden a comically-oversized AARP card. Because Jon Gruden is old.
I just...why is ESPN so obsessed with birthdays? It is weird.