Inside The Mind Of Doug Mirabelli

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For those of you who haven't quite had your fill of Doug Mirabelli, Knuckleball Savior, we gleefully present a brilliant thread on the infamous Sons Of Sam Horn board, in which a poster, inspired by an old posting, imagines what most have been going through the he-man mind of Mirabelli as he made his way from the Padres to Fenway Park.

7:02 am PDT: Awoken at home by phone call from Kevin Towers. Learns he's traded to Boston. Calls Towers a pickle smoker and tells him San Diego is for pussies anyway.
7:05: Takes 40 naked cuts in front of a mirror.
7:07: Packs a duffel bag with 10 tank tops, 5 pairs of tight jeans, and no underwear. Announces "Dougie's going commando" to no one in particular.
7:08: Kills it.
7:10: Calls Wake, tells him "Dougie's going deep tonight!" Wake says it's getting dusty in here. Dougie calls him a pantywaist.
7:15: Takes cologne shower. Uses Stetson.

Man, we should have learned how to catch a knuckleball. We might have been manlier.


Doug's Game Day Diary [Sons Of Sam Horn]

(UPDATE: For some reason, the folks at SOSH have moved the thread we linked to. We don't know why. If anybody finds it, send it to us, would you?)