Earlier this year, NCAA member institutions voted to redefine athletic scholarships so that they covered not only the cost of tuition, room and board, books, and fees, but also incidental expenses. Essentially, it gives players a bit of pocket money, which is really the least the NCAA could do considering the strict limits on “gifts” players can accept, and the impracticality of working a job while also attending class and participating in a sport full time. Now, instead of the NCAA making a billion dollars off the back of unpaid labor, they’ll be making a billion dollars off the back of barely-paid labor. Progress!

At Virginia Tech, football players will be getting either an $3,280 or $3,620 cost of attendance award, depending upon if they are in-state or not, per CBS Sports. Which gave Hokies defensive coordinator Bud Foster—who made $1.36 million as the highest paid assistant coach in the nation last year—an idea. Now that players get a pittance of money, he wants to fine them some of that pittance!

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Hey, Bud, you know what else happens in the real world? In the real world, you actually have to pay people for the labor they perform! Christ, look at this asshole. The second his players have a little bit in their pocket—and over a nine month school schedule it’s a bit under $100 a week—he’s scheming to use that as a cudgel to keep them in line. Never mind that this probably isn’t even allowed by the NCAA’s own rules, just imagine the type of person you’d have to be to see players get just a tiny fraction of the money they earn their schools and immediately think “how can I take this away from them to make myself feel good about being a big strong discipline man”?

Update (8:08 p.m.): That was quick.

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