Hey look, it's the dumbest sports column you'll read all week.
Since the death of his 2-year-old son, it has been revealed that Vikings running back Adrian Peterson has fathered multiple children with women to whom he is not married. This apparently offends the Baltimore Sun's Susan Reimer, who decided to write a column asking why people aren't more outraged by the fact that Peterson has children. Whatever, that's fine. If Susan Reimer wants us to wag her finger at Peterson for not wearing condoms, she can go ahead. But her column goes from run-of-the-mill stupid to what-the-fuck-is-even-going-on stupid when she gets to this part:
All of this transpired at the conclusion of a week when the call for the Washington Redskins to abandon a nickname viewed by some as offensive reached fever pitch, culminating in sportscaster Bob Costas' self-righteous address, delivered during halftime of Sunday Night Football.
President Barack Obama has suggested that owner Dan Snyder think about changing the name, the league is applying pressure on the team, and any number of sportswriters have said they will not use the name in their reporting.
But, so far, nobody has criticized Adrian Peterson for his careless and cavalier sexual behavior.
Once you've finished staring blankly at your computer screen, try to figure out what other people and things are worthy of Redskins-level scorn simply because they probably offend Susan Reimer. It's a fun game, I'll get us started:
- Rap music
- Grand Theft Auto V
- Your friend Todd from high school who liked to set off M80s at school