bate Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Watch The Republican Presidential Field Try And Fail To Pretend They Know When The College Football Championship Is Played
Last night's Republican presidential debate moderators, in a gesture of cruelty posing as kindness, asked the candidates to wrap up by saying what they'd rather be doing with this Saturday night, giving them a chance to show off their human sides. If any of these people were human a year ago, thou...

A Belarusian Goalie Participated In A Lionel Messi Trick-Shot Goal Today
It took just six seconds for Alyaksandr Pyotravich Hutar, goalkeeper extraordinaire for FC Bate Borisov, to look at his gloves after Lionel Messi scored the first of his two goals in UEFA Champions League play today. Because it was their fault, the whole perfectly bouncing the ball in front to ser...

Former Miami Walk-On Calls Out The NCAA's Hypocritical Racket
"The NCAA has duped people into believing this multibillion-dollar industry is pursued for the sake of amateurism. It's a total sham. The coaches aren't amateurs, the administrators aren't amateurs, the corporate sponsors and media companies aren't amateurs. The only 'amateurs' involved are the guys...

Chris Kluwe Responds: Can I Kick It? (Yes, I Can)
Dear Nate Jackson,...

Dear Chris Kluwe: When We Want The Punter's Opinion, We'll Ask For It (We Won't)
Chris Kluwe should know better....

Harry Potter Versus Star Wars: The Final Judgment
The final Harry Potter movie opens up this week, and all week long people have been saying "goodbye" to the franchise. Lots of crying in your butterbeer and all that....
![Exclusive: How An NBA Team Makes Money Disappear [UPDATE WITH CORRECTION]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1865o9ndt013bjpg.jpg)
Exclusive: How An NBA Team Makes Money Disappear [UPDATE WITH CORRECTION]
We've obtained audited financial data for the New Jersey Nets covering the three fiscal years from June 2003 to June 2006. Though the numbers end five years ago, you can still see the roots of the argument that will have NBA owners, come midnight, again locking out their players. You can also see ho...

LeBron James Is STILL A Cocksucker
If you missed last night's schaudenfreudegasm with LeBron and the Heat getting lane-raped by J.J. Barea for 48 minutes, oh how you missed out. There hasn't been a more gratifying moment for sports haters since the Saints beat Favre and Manning back-to-back in the NFC title game and Super Bowl. It w...

The Lakers Were Classless Yesterday, According To The Cue Cards Magic Johnson Is Reading
An alternate interpretation: "I am not. Reading from cue. Cards. Next card. I am saying. Original thoughts. That I have thought. I am doing. My very best. To sound somber and. Grave. By dramatically spacing. My words. Is it. Working."...

Diamondbacks Become Immigration Battle Prop
At last night's epic Mets/Diamondbacks showdown at Shi, er, Citi Field, Arizona-immigration-law protesters took to the diamond in the Wonder Twins Power form of Two Guys with Mexican Flags....

Timofey Mozgov Is Cocksucker
Today is day Timofey Mozgov becomes most unlikable person in Russian Basketball Super League, and perhaps all Russian sports. I think he is okay a year ago. No more. He is villain now....

Counterpoint: LeBron James Is Not A Cocksucker
Yesterday, a guy who spent seven seasons with the team that drafted him announced he wanted to play basketball with his friends and win a lot of games. He wanted this so badly that he was willing to take a pay cut....

LeBron James Is A Cocksucker
Tomorrow is the day LeBron James becomes the most unlikable person in the NBA, and perhaps all of American sports. I used to think he was okay a year ago. No more. He's the villain now....

The Legend Of Black Superman: Billy Ray Bates, Flying High In The Philippines
In the 1980s, Billy Ray Bates, dubbed "the Legend" by Brent Musberger, washed out of the NBA and onto the shores of the Philippines, where for a few wild years his legend grew, both on the court and in the bars....

Dustin Hoffman And Jason Bateman Smooch It Up On Staples Center Kiss Cam
Runaway Jury star Dustin Hoffman and Smokin' Aces thesp Jason Bateman sat beside each other at last night's game and appeared together on the kiss cam. Immediately afterwards, the Celtics fan behind them became violently ill on his common law wife. [DListed]...

Mengke Bateer's Second Career Only Slightly More Absurd Than His First
If you picked one name you never thought you'd hear again, 90 percent of you would say Mengke Bateer. A short-lived NBA career has given way to an acting career. By "acting" we of course mean murder with coconuts....

If A Photo Of A Norwegian Black Metal Band Is On Deadspin, That Means Shit Is Seriously Messed Up
For real. This is the first snow day since I've been at Gawker, but the server problems are quite severe this time site-wide and it's making everyone's day miserable. So we're shutting it down for today....

Justine Bateman Was NOT Roman Polanski’s Hot Tub Victim
This week's second Deadcast guest is actress, producer, and avid tumblr, uh, er, Justine Bateman....

Gary “Baba Booey” Dell'abate Becomes Latest Celebrity To Emasculate Himself With First-Pitch Disaster
This is truly awful. It's actually worse than his wince-worthy ex-girlfriend apology videos. But at least we now know who taught him how to throw a baseball. [YouTube]...
