central Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
2020 AL Central Preview
“Flyover Country” in the American League contains history’s greatest home-run squad (Minnesota, somehow), perhaps the league’s most exciting team….and then three teams not even trying. This is pretty much the norm in baseball these days, a division that has one or two teams fighting over actual priz...
Reds' Aristides Aquino Broke The Cubs And Made Some History
Reds rookie Aristides Aquino decided to have his breakout game against the Cubs on Saturday with three home runs in his first three at-bats, and a new record of becoming the first rookie to smash a dinger in three consecutive innings....
The Indians Are Coming To Try And Take Out The Twins
The Minnesota Twins had a 3.5-game AL Central lead heading into Wednesday, but then a trio of results nearly cut it in half, setting up a high-stakes four-game home series with their division-rival Cleveland Indians, where the Twins could be in danger of losing sole possession of first place for the...
MLB Suspends Four Pirates, Three Reds, One Guy Who's Now On A Different Team For Brawl
MLB has announced the fallout for Tuesday night’s brawl during Pirates-Reds: Six players and both managers have been suspended. Pittsburgh relief pitcher Keone Kela “won” with the longest punishment at 10 games, but all the players are appealing theirs....
Trevor Bauer Knows He Could Just Not Pitch To Max Kepler, Right?
The Minnesota Twins are socking dingers at a historic pace, and the individual that is currently leading everyone on the roster in that stat is Max Kepler. With that knowledge, it shouldn’t be a complete surprise that he added a couple more in a 6-2 win over the Indians on Saturday, especially when ...
Max Kepler Kept Calling Trevor Bauer's Bluff
Twins outfielder Max Kepler was fantastic in Thursday’s 5-4 win over Cleveland as he went 4-for-4 with three home runs and a walk. There are two ways to look at this performance, and they’re not mutually exclusive. You could say that Kepler had a hell of a night, and you could say that opposing pitc...
Royals-White Sox Beef Gains New Life As Pitcher Tossed For Hitting Tim Anderson In The Head
The beef between White Sox shortstop and good bat-flipper Tim Anderson and the Kansas City Royals reared its ugly head again Wednesday night, when Anderson was plunked in the helmet in the second inning by Royals starter Glenn Sparkman. In an effort to get out ahead of any escalating hostility, home...
78 Seconds Of Batshit Argentine Soccer Features Violent Tackles, Tears, Unconscionable Flopping
Argentine soccer is plagued by a bullshit macho culture where the biggest sin is losing and the biggest virtue is lunging about, heedlessly throwing your body into as many opponents as possible to prove how large your testicles are. For a short clip demonstrating the anarchic, violent, dive-y style ...
Bucks Take Pistons' Best Punch, Then Coolly Dropkick Them Into A Toilet
The Pistons got off to a very good start Monday night, at home, in Game 4 of their playoff series against Central division foe Milwaukee. Blake Griffin was lively; Reggie Jackson poured in 20 first-half points; the Pistons all but played Brook Lopez and Khris Middleton off the court. It was about as...
Benches Clear After Royals Plunk Tim Anderson On The Ass For Enjoying His Homer
A batter took a baseball to the ass, the benches cleared, and both managers got in each other’s faces in today’s Royals-White Sox game, all because a pitcher was irritated that the batter celebrated his sweet home run....
Ah Jeez, The Video Of UCF's Locker Room After Losing To Duke Is Heartbreaking
UCF was so, so close to upsetting Duke in Sunday’s second-round game, but the Knights fell, 77-76, and were instantly, visibly crushed by how they lost. (As Aubrey Dawkins’s putback attempt rimmed out and time expired, you can see Terrell Allen, No. 2, put his hands on his head as he falls to the fl...
The NCAA Will Never Give UCF A Chance
The College Football Playoff bracket was set yesterday—pitting Alabama against Oklahoma and Clemson against Notre Dame—and for the second year in a row, the undefeated UCF Knights are nowhere to be found. Just as they had to settle for the Peach Bowl against Auburn last season, UCF will play LSU, a...
Harrowing McKenzie Milton Injury Update Includes The Phrase "Blood Flow Has Been Restored"
Friday afternoon UCF star quarterback McKenzie Milton went directly from the 25-yard line of Raymond James Stadium, where he was writhing in agony with his leg bent in a very wrong direction, to Tampa General Hospital, where he underwent surgery. He’s still there today, and his family says there are...
Central Florida Quarterback McKenzie Milton Carted Off After Gruesome Knee Injury
Central Florida star quarterback McKenzie Milton took a shotgun snap on third-and-7 in Friday’s game against South Florida and, after a play-action fake, kept the ball and raced around the right end of the defense, where he ran into a pair of South Florida defenders, one of whom went low. What happe...
The Central Park Mandarin Duck Went Missing. I Tried To Find It.
NEW YORK — I can’t even get the binoculars to work....
Usain Bolt, Aspiring Soccer Player, Scores Two Goals In His First Start
Usain Bolt’s conversion from track star to soccer player continues apace. In August, Bolt got his first taste of the footy when he came off the bench for Australian team Central Coast Mariners in a friendly match and actually acquitted himself fairly decently. He built on that performance today, mak...
Central Oklahoma Football Player Loses Foot After Getting Run Over By A Train
Central Oklahoma defensive back Derek Loccident lost his left foot in a freak accident early Sunday morning in downtown Oklahoma City. According to police, Loccident was on the train tracks near Fourth Street and E.K Gaylord Boulevard around 2:30 a.m. when an oncoming train ran his foot over, severi...
Usain Bolt Is A Soccer Player Now And He's Actually Not Terrible
Usain Bolt may have retired from track, but he hasn’t given up sports entirely. He is currently signed to a trial contract with the Central Coast Mariners, an Australia A-League team, trying to realize his dream of becoming a pro soccer player. He made his official debut in a preseason friendly last...
Headbuttin' College Closer Very Pleased To Have Escaped A Jam
UCF beat Miami 4-0 on Wednesday, thanks in large part to closer Bryce Tucker’s performance in the final frame. Miami managed to load the bases with nobody out in the bottom of the ninth, at which point Tucker nailed shit down by striking out the side....
CMU Soccer Player Rescues Drowning Squirrel, Revives It With CPR Thanks In Part To <i>The Office</i>
In a heartwarming tale of a college freshman doing something right, Central Michigan women’s soccer player Natalie Belsito saved a drowning critter on campus. She credited the successful rescue to an episode of The Office....