chris Page 174 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jesus Gets An Automatic Major For Cross-Checking
Finally, the protection you need to ward off Miroslav Satan during the power play. Or possibly for that problematic away game against the New Jersey Devils. Over at Christian Throwback Jersey.com, no sport is untouched by the power of Christ. In the basketball section, for instance, there are even...

Please Heed These Tips For A Safe And Fun Halloween
This is for all of you Halloween revelers who are planning on being clever tomorrow night and dress up like Steve Irwin, the Crocodile Hunter. And you know who you are. We see you with the Paul Hogan hat and the toy sting ray and the too-tight khaki shorts, and we're begging you to stop. My God, man...

Ugly, Cold And Wet: The Beauty Of Game 3
Last night's Cardinals 5-0 victory over the Tigers to take a 2-1 lead in the World Series was, we will confess, not exactly the type of game you'll remember 10 years from now. It was basically Chris Carpenter being completely filthy and a bunch of Tigers players being hit in the testicles and fall...

It's Nice To Have Chris Carpenter
Sometimes we forget that sometimes, all you need, is a dominant No. 1 starter — even one who claims his favorite band is the Dave Matthews Band — and an opposing pitcher with bloodshot eyes who throws 100 mile-per-hour fastballs five feet to the left of an already-running third baseman....

Time For Game 3 At Busch
We'd like to thank Joe Sports Fan for this photo of a true Cardinals superfan; this is exactly what we're wearing to the game tomorrow....

Parents Sentence Son To Lifetime Of Ass-Kickings
As The Mighty MJD mentioned on Sunday, Leann and Rusty Real of D'Iberville, Miss., have named their kid ESPN Montana Real. That's pronounced "Espen," as in, "Mrs. Johnson! The other boys have run Espen's pants up the flagpole again!"...

NFL Awards Chris Henry More Free Time
From Buck O'Neil... to Chris Henry....

Ah ... When The Catchphrases Felt Only SLIGHTLY Warmed Over
Here's your little blast for the past today: As difficult as it is to believe that Hootie and the Blowfish were ever considered cool — we're not sure that actually ever happened — it's, these days, just as difficult to comprehend ESPN being, you know, down with the kids. These two unique cultural cu...

A Deeply Regrettable Wrong
Before we get started in on an extremely busy sports day, we have some business to attend to....

Watch, As Odell Thurman's Career Evaporates
In case you haven't quite had your fill of the Odell Thurman EXTREME DUI story, the Cincinnati Enquirer has your back this morning: Exclusive video of Odell's actual arrest....

Henry Vomits, But Isn't Arrested. Kudos, Chris!
We know we touched on this earlier today, but it really does warrant its own post....

Chris Fowler, Mrs. BodyShaping
Remember "BodyShaping?" That old ESPN show that featured, uh, people in Spandex lifting things and hopping around at a location of indistinguishable but distinctly beach-like flavor? Well, the host of that show was a woman named Jennifer Dempster, and, as MJD touched on this weekend, she recently ma...

Hall Of Fame Inductee: You're With Me, Leather
Presenting ... the first member of the inaugural class of the Deadspin Hall Of Fame ......

We Saw Chris Simms Make A Spinach Dip In A Loaf Of Sourdough Bread Once
Now. We don't want to cast aspersions. We know how life in an NFL locker room goes. You're with each other for half the year, sweating, bleeding, killing yourself out there for the sake of a common goal. You develop a kinship that cannot be quantified by any conventional standards....

Chris Cooley's Pyrrhic Victory
The good news for Redskins TE Chris Cooley in last years game against Dallas is that he busted loose for three touchdowns in a 35-7 victory. The bad news was that in one of Cooley's four fantasy leagues, as noted here in the Washington Post, his fantasy opponent started Cooley against him. Cooley's ...

Finally Making Some Money Off Southeast Jerome
Fully capitalizing on something it stumbled across last season, the official Redskins site Redskins.com is now selling T-shirts adorned with every Clinton Portis character from his press conferences last year. Those who were with us last season will remember our schoolgirl crush on Portis, particu...

Minor Enterprise: Baby, You Can Drive My Car
Welcome to Minor Enterprise, where we preview, and occasionally review, the great events of minor league baseball. Each Wednesday we'll take a look at the promotions, players and mascots which populate our minor league ballparks; the unsung heroes of our national pastime. (Minor Enterprise not res...

Trev Alberts Returns To TV (Kind Of)
You might not remember this, since it was almost a year ago and we typically can't remember what happened last week, but last September college football analyst Trev Alberts was fired by ESPN for "not showing up for work", though we have mostly heard since then that Alberts was fed up with the carto...

Unhappy To Be Stuck With You
We've all known that our main man Chris Berman — who was such a joy to watch broadcasting the Cardinals-Cubs game last night! — has had a lifelong pants party with Huey Lewis And The News. (We think they show the footage of him on stage with the band at least twice a year.) But we had no idea just h...

It's Carl Monday Night At The Ballpark
As you know, we're big fans of minor league baseball, particularly the odd promotions they put together from time-to-time. (We still think our favorite is the time a team gave away free vasectomies on Father's Day.) And a couple of weeks ago, we pointed you to the Dunedin Blue Jays' professional w...