cowboys Page 65 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Brief History Of Quincy Carter
For those who remember, and for those who can't forget:...

Join Terrell Owens' Special Club
We suppose, in a roundabout way, that it makes sense for fans of Terrell Owens to be fans of Terrell Owens, and Terrell Owens only; rooting for the team that your favorite player T.O. suits up for seems kind of beside the point....

Get Your T.O. Slice Of Funk
The official Terrell Owens Web site has been playing an odd game of hide-and-seek with its T.O. Cowboys rap. One minute it's on the site, the next minute it's off. We don't know what its deal is....

Terrell Owens Can Rap Quicker Than You
In recent months, we have done everything in our power to institute a moratorium on Terrell Owens-related news, if just so that, if we were hit by a bus tomorrow, we would be able to talk to our maker with our pure heart, free of egregious sin....

Cowboys Finally Find A Suitable Replacement For Michael Irvin
As was mentioned briefly here yesterday, The Dallas Morning News is reporting that Terrell Owens has reached an agreement in principle with the Dallas Cowboys. A formal announcement is expected within a few days....

I Think It's Time Eddie Sutton Had A Reality Show
Police in Stillwater have obtained video footage of Eddie Sutton urinating in public. On a middle school. With a bottle in his hand. Oh dear....

Just How Drunk Was Eddie Sutton?
Well, he blew a .22. To figure out how many drinks per hour that is, first, we have to take a guess at the man's weight. Now, I've been fired from my job trying to guess people's weight at the carnival three or four times, so I'm not very good at it. But if we guess an even 200 pounds, consuting ...

Clearing The 1 o'clock Table...
• San Diego 7, Kansas City 20. So, what did you use for pregame motivation, Marty, the tape of Jim Mora screaming, "PLAYOFFS? PLAYOFFS?!" I feel much pain. • Buffalo 37, Cincinnati 27. Rough day for Chad Johnson. First, someone stole his reindeer (I HATE YOU, whoever it was), and then, they lose to ...

Tuna About To Spoil?
ESPN's Chris Mortensen reported this morning that Cowboys head coach Bill Parcells is considering retiring at the conclusion of this year. Cowboys owner Jerry Jones is pushing him to sign an extension, but the death of Parcells' brother a few weeks ago has him thinking retirement, according to Mor...

Blogdom's Best: Hating The Cowboys
Previously we have examined the great fan blogs of the NFL and Major League Baseball, and what an interesting journey it was. But every great story needs a strong antagonist, and to that end we now present the anti-blogs — those Web chronicles devoted to abhorrence and loathing — what the French cal...

How 'Bout That Darrell Armstrong?!
We've always wondered what would happen if we ended up a semi-prominent public figure in, say, Chicago, or Iowa City, Iowa. As lifelong Cardinals and Illini boosters, it would be impossible for us to hide our loyalties; we couldn't pretend to root for the Cubs or the Hawkeyes even if our livelihoo...

Professor Irvin's Class Is In Session
The Miami Herald points us in the direction of something that was new to us: The Michael Irvin Academic Resource Academy. Irvin recently dedicated the "learning center" in Ft. Lauderdale, and whatever our thoughts about Irvin, it's difficult to find much fault in the gesture. Its goal is to help "...

NFL Roundup: Sad Colts, Happy Bolts
• We'll confess, we were actually kind of rooting for the Colts not to finish 16-0. Not because we have anything against them — we don't, save for maybe a suspicion that Edgerrin James did a guest spot on the seventh floor crew — but because we will never have faith in Tony Dungy and Peyton Chessn...

Clearing The 4 o'clock Table...
• Cleveland 9, Oakland 7. If you watched this one, you're a diehard Browns fan, a diehard Raiders fan, or a person with severe emotional problems, and I'm worried about you. Let's get you some help. • Bengals 41, Detroit 17. Even Chad Johnson knows that it's bad form to celebrate the mundane accom...

The Severe Beating of the Dallas Cowboys
The Redskins are beating the Cowboys in just about every possible way that a team can be beaten. You have to wonder how all of our lives would be different if more of the original cowboy vs. Native American matchups had gone this way in the early history of our nation....

Setting the 4 o'clock Table...
• Dallas @ Washington. I think you'll want to watch this one when you see your other two options below... • Cincinnati @ Detroit. Because someone needs to prove to Matt Millen that is is possible to resurrect a moribund franchise. • Cleveland @ Oakland. There are only 3 games at 4 o'clock today, whi...

Adam Morrison is a hero
"Major onions" was how Bill Raftery described it. The play-by-play guy ended the telecast by calling Morrison "the best college basketball player in the country." He may be that, I don't know, but I think JJ Redick's 41 points against the #2 team in the nation at least leaves the issue open for deba...

Blogdom's Best: Dallas Cowboys
It's a melancholic yet festive time here at Deadspin Studios as we say goodbye to one of our regular features, the NFL Edition of Blogdom's Best. To celebrate our 32nd and final entry — the Dallas Cowboys — we've decided to throw a wrap party and invite Cowboys past, present and recently deceased ...

Beleaguered "NFL Countdown" Closed Captioning Typists Get One-Week Reprieve
We were on a very slow-moving piece of public transportation and therefore are just hitting the late news: Michael Irvin has been suspended for one week following his arrest last Friday for having a "pipe" in his car. This is only two days after handsomely named ESPN exec Norby Williamson said "Ri...

Michael Irvin's Selective Memory
Yesterday, we were wondering when, exactly, ESPN found out about "analyst" Michael Irvin's arrest last week. Well, USA Today's intrepid Michael Hiestand talked to Bristol brass for today's paper, and it turns out, they found out Sunday, two days after the arrest ... but not from Irvin....