enterprise Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Aaron Judge made the right decision
In the end, it came down to being either Derek Jeter or Robinson Cano....
The Yankees deserved this
“New York Yankees” and “inferiority complex” are two combinations of words that have probably never met in a sentence for over 100 years or so. This is the New York Yankees, the absolute biggest symbol of American exceptionalism, even when it’s a sport that no other place plays. They’re the Yankees,...
West London is not going to welcome The Ricketts Family
It’s pretty clear that the Ricketts family, who own the Cubs, look upon Fenway Sports Group as something of an idol. They took their GM from Boston and made him the president of the Cubs. You know him as Theo Epstein. They have remade Wrigley Field and the neighborhood around it in the same fashion ...
Here come the Yankees... either up the standings, onto the COVID list, or both
The hope for most teams before and after the trade deadline is that their new acquisitions will lead to either some sort of inspirational turnaround or make it clear just how much more they’re solidified for the playoffs. It hasn’t worked out that way for a lot of teams....
SEE IT! Cat (and COVID) on the loose at Yankee Stadium
A cat ran onto the field at Yankee Stadium last night, and it was just about the most interesting thing to happen to the Yankees all season....
Everything is going great in the Bronx, except for the numbskull fans and very not good Yankees baseball
For everyone who’s ever said the Yankees are the worst, today is your day....
Blues Honor Rent-A-Car Company With Color Guard Flag, Then Quietly Dishonor It
You might think sports are about sports. No. They’re about the troops. And America. And sometimes Canada too, but rarely in the NHL playoffs. But how can you prove, if you’re a team in, say, the Stanley Cup Final, that you really care about America and its uniformed services? (If you go one day with...
The Revolution Delayed After Newspaper Retracts Realest Cop Quote Ever
For a brief time earlier today, shit got very real when a Kentucky newspaper, The News-Enterprise, printed that “Hardin County Sheriff John Ward said those who go into law enforcement typically do it because they have a desire to shoot minorities.” Seriously; it’s right here....
Mexican Drug Lords Launder Money Through Horse Racing, U.S. Government Alleges
There's a lot that's terribly shadowy and evil about the sport of horse racing, from the dead horses on set at HBO's Luck to the dead horses at the Aqueduct to the dead horses really anywhere horses race....
It's Professional Naked Lady Bobblehead Night
The Las Vegas 51s gave away bobbleheads of Holly Madison, the number one gal in Hugh Hefner's harem. A bobblehead? I can't masturbate to that. [Rick Chandler]...
Greatest Minor League Promotion Ever Ruined By Wrath Of Tebow
The Fort Myers Miracle planned to pay homage to that miracle-maker Tim Tebow tonight, but what happened instead? Try an approaching tornado, an aborted circumcision, and a cease-and-desist letter from UF. God does not take kindly to your mockery....
Women, Children Frightened By Giant Hamburger
The official unveiling of the West Michigan Whitecaps' immense 5,000-calorie Fifth Third Burger on Thursday stirred up a variety of emotions, but the following quote is by far my favorite:...
If You've Eaten A Four-Pound Burger, Of Course You'll Need A Giant Plunger
Still grappling with the media frenzy over its monstrous 5,000-calorie burger, the West Michigan Whitecaps, masters of the metaphor, have installed a giant plunger in the outfield that squirts water on fans....
Minor League Team Invites You To Watch A Game FROM A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER
If your lifelong dream has been to watch a minor league baseball game from a 1978 GMC van parked just beyond the outfield near a major river, then you're in luck, my fat motivational-speaking friend....
Use All Of These You Want, You're Not Going To Help Sabathia
As is befitting a team with a mascot named Thunder, the Lake Elsinore Storm (Class A, California League) is giving out free samples of Subtle Butt anti-fart shields at their weekly all-you-can-eat Tuesday home games....
Sorry, BlueClaws' 'Kids Eat Free' Promotion Does Not Include Beer
What minor league baseball team dares to feed your kids for free at every 2009 home game? The Lakewood BlueClaws. Take that, stupid economy....
Mets Welcome Redundant, Gramatically Questionable Triple-A Team
The New York Mets' Triple-A affiliate is now located in Buffalo, where it had been previously associated with the Cleveland Indians. But, I thought the plural of Bison was Bison? [New York Daily News]...
If A Game Lasts Longer Than Four Hours, Please Consult Your Doctor
A reader writes: "Hey guys, So I hate to have to play the "penis" card here, but somebody down in North Carolina needs to be admonished for selecting a logo with some very Freudian undertones."...
Experience The Fun Of Minnesota's U.S. Senate Election Recount With The St. Paul Saints
Here's comedian and senatorial candidate Al Franken throwing out the first pitch at a St. Paul Saints game earlier this season. It was a wise move on Mr. Franken's part, considering that the Saints' attendance that day was 12,450, and he's currently trailing in his U.S. Senate recount with Norm Cole...