eve Page 330 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

LeCharles Bentley Is Pretty In Brown
Day one of the NFL's free agent season was fairly quiet with none of the really big names finding new homes. The Cleveland Browns have made the biggest splash so far, singing offensive linemen LeCharles Bentley, Kevin Shaffer, and wide receiver Joe Jerevicius....

Four Tiny Tidbits On: The Indians
We re less than a month from Opening Day, so it s time to start previewing the season. Inspired by an old feature on The Black Table, we re going team-by-team and distributing Four Things You Don t Know about them. If you have suggested oddities on your team, send them to us at [email protected]. ...

The Ladies Love The Baseball
We always find it kind of embarrassing when major sports leagues make conscious efforts to try to cater to the female audience. From our experience, a woman is either a sports fan, or she isn't — you know, like the rest of the human population. League executives tend to think of female sports fans t...

Larry Brown Suicide Watch: Day 2
A reader tips us to the photo that was on the ESPN front this morning: "You know how they say 'a picture's worth a thousand words?' Check out this photo from the front page of ESPN.com's web site this morning. Larry Brown's countenance pretty much sums it up. Funny picture."...

A Penny For Your NBA Thoughts
As the NBA trading deadline looms, it will be hard to top the big trade that brought Steve Francis to New York — thus insuring an NBA championship for the Knicks next season (just kidding, they're doomed). The Knicks sent Penny Hardaway and Trevor Ariza to Orlando. Personally, we think the trade m...

Steve Francis Will Attempt To Love Stephon Marbury As He Once Loved Cuttino Mobley
And Larry Brown will hate them both....

Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Bob Sansevere
The St. Paul Pioneer-Press has an annual contest called "Average Joe Columnist," in which a field of 16 non-journalists submit sports articles, and are judged American Idol-style by sports editor Mike Bass and columnist Bob Sansevere. The latter, it seems, fancies himself in the Simon Cowell role — ...

This Is Not A Picture Of Chastity Bono
Far be it from us to mock a guy for going back to rediscover his roots and promote the game of baseball internationally ... but sweet God, what has happened to former Reds reliever Danny Graves? When you get back from Vietnam, before you head to Indians training camp ... might we suggest a workou...

Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Steve Serby
Yes, he once wrote that "if Tom Brady were a politician, he'd be JFK." OK, he once, on assignment at the 2001 Super Bowl, wrote an entire column off of radio quotes. OK, sure, he's at times jingoistic, hackneyed and wishy-washy. Yeah, yeah, it's true that Jets' quarterback Richard Todd once smacke...

Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Steve Kelley
"Steve Kelley looked at his column. He had only one sentence so far, so he hit the "enter" key and described it. Then he did that for the second sentence, and he was three paragraphs in. Soon, his column-inch target would be met. But not soon enough for Kelley." Our thanks to DMZ at U.S.S.Mari...

LeBron James Is Three Years Younger Than The Bush Twins
Yep, the rumors you've heard are correct: LeBron James is turning 21 years old tomorrow....

Steelers Putting Their Thing Down
Those of you who are hoping for a Browns upset over the Steelers today are likely to end up quite sad. Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger is apparently still quite bitter about the afore-mentioned Mr. Football snub, and he's playing his best ball of the year....

Blogdom's Best: Hating The Browns
We've been poring over so many NFL hater blogs lately that we're beginning to feel like Mr. Potter from "It's a Wonderful Life," or worse yet, Al Davis. We long to examine other areas of hate, preferably ones which do not include 350-pound persons who could hurt us. So after today, we will shift g...

Clearing The 4 o'clock Table...
• Cleveland 9, Oakland 7. If you watched this one, you're a diehard Browns fan, a diehard Raiders fan, or a person with severe emotional problems, and I'm worried about you. Let's get you some help. • Bengals 41, Detroit 17. Even Chad Johnson knows that it's bad form to celebrate the mundane accom...

Non-Chad Johnson TDs Suck
Instead of fining Chad Johnson for excessive touchdown celebrations, Paul Tagliabue should start fining Bengals who score TDs that aren't named Chad Johnson....

Setting The 1 o'clock Table...
• Chicago @ Pittsburgh. The Bears will be without safety Mike Brown and starting right guard Terrence Metcalf. Pittsburgh will be without any healthy joints on their starting quarterback. And can someone explain to me why Pittsburgh is a 6-point favorite here? • Indianapolis @ Jacksonville. Many p...

Why Steve Smith Will Always Be Second
A friend of ours yesterday was asking us why, in our unprofessional opinion, Chad Johnson receives so much love for his touchdown celebrations while the Panthers' Steve Smith, who scores more touchdowns, catches more passes and does his own fair share of creative celebrating, is barely noticed. We...

Athlete Run-Ins: Steve's Sax
Today's first athlete run-in story is so terrifying that we have no choice but not to believe it, though the guy insists it's true. It's about former big leaguer Steve Sax. We present it with little comment, from J.R. in Atlanta....

Blogdom's Best: Cleveland Browns
It might not — yet — have the online fanaticism and cachet of baseball, but the NFL and its fans are starting to catch up in the world of team-devoted blogs. To this end, Deadspin salutes these modem-addled souls and proudly presents Blogdom's Best, given to the most outstanding blog for each NFL ...

Wait ... It's Mariucci's Fault?
After watching that wretched Lions' loss to the Falcons yesterday — we'll do anything to make the NFL take away the guaranteed Lions homegame on Thanksgiving every year; that game is NEVER competitive — word is starting to rumble: The Lions are considering firing coach Steve Mariucci. This is Mari...