f Page 1375 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Howard Eskin's So Excited About The Sixers' Trade, He Can't Type
What’s your favorite typo in this Howard Eskin tweet that seems like it was composed while the author was falling down the stairs?...

Markelle Fultz Is Excited About Philly Because Of Its Chicken Sandwiches
Markelle Fultz, taken first overall by the Sixers last night, has a column today in The Players’ Tribune. While it doesn’t quite reach the levels of Dion Waiters’s opus in April, it’s pretty good. Fultz shows off some personality. He says Joel Embiid has texted him 75 times since he visited Philly. ...

Wiseass At NBA Draft Shouts Out Picks Right Before They're Announced
Anyone with internet access can figure out the NBA Draft minutes before the picks are announced on TV. Adrian Wojnarowski used to spoil the ceremony, and now the task has been seemingly taken over by Wojbomb apprentice Shams Charania. But last night, even the people at the draft were spoiling the pi...

Cops Discover Meth Lab, Golf Cart Chop Shop In Retirement Community Garage<em></em>
The Villages, a hilariously-large retirement community in Florida, is the fastest-growing “city” in the country—with more than 117,000 people, 48 golf courses, geriatric sex (with a resulting high rate of STDs), and absolutely no children (they’re only permitted to visit for up to 30 days a year). R...

Is That Really All The Bulls Could Get For Jimmy Butler?
The Minnesota Timberwolves managed to snag Jimmy Butler from the Chicago Bulls last night, and the price they paid for him leaves me wondering how the hell no other teams snapped him up first....

Mets Fan Nearly Drops Baby For Foul Ball, And Mom Is <i>Pissed</i>
In the eighth inning of last night’s 6-3 Dodgers win, one Mets fan decided he could make a one-handed play on a foul ball with a baby already in the other arm. He did, I suppose, though I’m not sure the baby’s mother would agree with his decision-making....

Danny Ainge Still Sounds Pissed Josh Jackson Canceled His Workout
With Markelle Fultz and Lonzo Ball sure things at 1 and 2, the biggest drama on draft night was the Celtics’ pick at No. 3. Danny Ainge, president of basketball operations, said Boston was going to get the same player at 3 that they would have wanted at No. 1. That was undoubtedly a wing, who would ...

Intriguing Foreign NBA Second-Round Draft Picks, Ranked
1. Alpha Kaba (France, pick no. 60, Atlanta Hawks)...

Jimmy Butler's Trainer Has Met Drug Dealers With Better Morals Than Bulls GM Gar Forman
A few hours after Jimmy Butler was traded to the Timberwolves for some odds and ends lying around the office, his trainer had some strong words for the Bulls’ front office:...

Here's LaVar Ball Being Raucously Booed While Leaving The Draft
As expected, the Lakers selected UCLA point guard Lonzo Ball with the second overall pick of tonight’s NBA draft. As expected, his father LaVar Ball had some grand proclamations to make beforehand. (Mainly that he had it on the good authority of Zeus and Jesus themselves that Lonzo would be drafted ...

Here's How The First Round Of The 2017 NBA Draft Shook Out
The biggest story of the NBA draft’s first round was the Bulls and Timberwolves swapping picks as part of a trade that sent Jimmy Butler to Minnesota in an absurdly low package. Apart from that, things unfolded largely without incident. Kristaps Porzingis is still a Knick, Paul George is still a Pac...

His Time, But Not His Words
Sounds like this company needs to watch its spokespeople more closely. Ah, well. It’s a Philly sports tradition....

Reports: Bulls Trade Jimmy Butler To Timberwolves For Zach LaVine, Kris Dunn
Days of frenzied Jimmy Butler trade rumors have apparently met their end, via reports from Adrian Wojnarowski and the Chicago Tribune’s K.C. Johnson, among others. The Bulls are sending Butler and their No. 16 draft pick to Minnesota in exchange for shooting guard Zach LaVine, point guard Kris Dunn ...

Roger Federer Is Back On His Feet
Roger Federer is no longer cause for alarm, but not quite celebration, either. After his first match on his favorite surface ended in a freak loss to 39-year-old Tommy Haas, the Swiss routed world No. 66 Yuichi Sugita in his first match at the Halle Open, and today faced his first real test in No. 2...

Panthers Recruit Chris Pronger To Help With Their Master Plan, Whatever That Is
A worst-case scenario for an existing team going through an expansion draft is losing one useful player. The Florida Panthers—already a bad team—lost two last night. Today, they hired Hall of Famer Chris Pronger to join their front office, prompting the question, what exactly did the Panthers sell t...

French Fitness Blogger Dies In Freak Whipped Cream Canister Accident
French fitness blogger and Instagram user Rebecca Burger died Sunday after a pressurized whipped cream canister exploded and struck her in the chest, according to a statement from her family....

Report: Phil Jackson Was Falling In And Out Of Sleep During A Prospect's Workout
ESPN’s Jay Williams just told a story absurd enough to rile up the typically unflappable Bob Ley: a top-15 draft pick said Knicks president Phil Jackson was falling in and out of sleep during his workout....

Derek Carr Is Getting Paid
The Raiders took care of business with franchise quarterback Derek Carr, who was about to enter the final year of his rookie contract until this happened:...

Donald Trump Drives Golf Cart On The Green, Like A True Shithead
America’s big golfing boy is golfing again, and he’s also proving that his total disdain for physical activity of any kind has turned him into the type of person who drives a golf cart on the green....

Juventus Teen's Dad Demands Club Pay Him In Farming Equipment Like They Promised
After becoming the first player born this millennium to appear in a match in one of Europe’s big five leagues last season, 17-year-old Juventus forward Moise Kean is already making hay in Serie A. Moise’s father, however, is upset at Juve for hampering his ability to make rice and corn back in Ivory...