ii Page 92 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Somewhere, A Haitian Boy Is Hatless
Here's a photo from a reader who found this rare, 19-0* New England Patriots Super Bowl hat at a 99-cent store in Brooklyn....

The Glue-Handed Patroller Of The Middle Exterior
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Red Smiths, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's...

Meet All The Herschel Walkers Tonight
Tonight, ABC's Nightline has an interview with former running back Herschel Walker about his battle with multiple-personality disorder. We find out that Herschel went so some very spooky places while in the throes of his disease, like suicidal thoughts and unpredictable violent urges. Walker's ex-wi...

Gen. Petraeus Rocks The Wii Golf
Gen. Petraeus is testifying before Congress tomorrow. As you prepare your notes for his testimony, we ask you to remember his human side, his fun side, his ... Wii golf side. We understand: Sometimes golf can seem like a 100 Years Game to us too....

TV Listings (With Proper Timestampery)
Quite exciting, this web log magic. For once the TV listings will show up on the correct date, unless of course I'm merely being preemptively presumptuous and the TV listings for today appear sometime next Thursday on Jalopnik. So let's see where the time-o-meter takes us, so in the meantime, please...

Gee, Your New Rule Smells Terrific
There's now a proposal — by, surprisingly, the Kansas City Chiefs — to ban long hair in the NFL next season. The owners will consider it at their meetings in Palm Beach, Fla., next week, because, you know, all the major prblems with the league have been solved. The Steelers' Troy Polamalu is waiting...

The Super Bowl Commercial They Wouldn't Let You See
Can't decide if this is great or merely interesting, but my dog liked it a lot. Here's a Bud Light commercial that was supposed to have been shown during the Super Bowl, but was banned by the FCC. Found this over at BostonSportz. It's new to me, anyway....

There's No 'I' In 'Douchebag'
Drew over at KSK asked Johnny at Metroville to write a piece about what it means to be a Patriots fan, one week later. We decided it would be a better fit here. You decide....

The Patriots Petition: Greatest Hits
Time to check in on the petition for the NFL to investigate the final 1:40 of Super Bowl XLII, as seen on Petition Online.com (and mentioned here on Saturday). Petitions on this site are usually pretty tepid, bewildering affairs: Take for example petition for the betterment of UNC football (26 signa...

So What Was Up With Those Awful Super Bowl Commercials?
Gupta has recently apologized for the ads and pulled the panda one from the airwaves, but this whole thing is probably going exactly to plan....

In Reebok's Alternate Universe, The Patriots Are 19-0
You had to figure that Reebok filmed two versions of its Perfectville Super Bowl commercial, and indeed, here it is; as reported by Larry Brown Sports. The highlight for me is the deliveryman with the "Patriots 19-0" T-shirt … possibly the only one of those still remaining in the Northern Hemisphere...

The Final Jamboroo And The Art Of Being A Sports Fan Without Watching Sports
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon. Well, until today, anyway....

Light Dawns On The Patriots
We have made no secret of our enduring love of The Dugout, both in its original incarnation and its current, non-expletive form at AOL Sports. But you think these guys just know baseball? Pshaw....

OK, Last Photoshop, We Promise!
Except for the ones below, that is. There's just so many amusing ones out there, that it's hard to stop. And now, for the final word on Super Bowl XLII, we'll hand the mic over to Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, who as you might imagine is quite enthused with the result. In fact, it may be his fin...

Hey, What Else Are You Going To Use A Backyard For?
This is what Crystal Meth will do to you. So be careful, kids....

Analyzing Belichick's Insane Decision Not To Kick
Of all the oddities during Super Bowl XLII, the one that might stick, and the one that might hurt the reputation of Patriots coach Bill Belichick the most, was his decision to go for it instead of sending kicker Stephen Gostkowski out for a 49-yard field goal. That doesn't look good when you lose a ...

Whining About Patriots' Loss Now A Greater Threat Than Global Warming
So this is somewhat amusing. According to Amani Toomer, before the game on Sunday Patriots' players were inviting him to their victory parties. "They were inviting us to their parties after the game," Toomer said. "They showed us no respect." Meanwhile, Tom Brady has dropped out of the Pro Bowl (exp...

Patriots Fans Cry The Tears Of Unfathomable Sadness
As you may have imagined, folks are having a bit of fun with the Super Bowl result, Photoshop-wise. Following are some of this morning's more interesting efforts. I have to admit, I chuckled at most of them. And by the way ... if you happen to come across this, it isn't a Photoshop. These books are ...

The Super Bowl Was A Proud Week For The Series Of Tubes
Sports By Brooks pointed this out earlier, but it bears repeating: This might have been the first Super Bowl with any interesting news almost entirely reported by blog. And it's not a matter of "indie" bloggers coming in to take the piss out of everybody either....