ill Page 615 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Miller Park: Just The Latest Stadium Of Death (UPDATE)
Two freak accidents in two days, and it's clear that spectators in Milwaukee are taking their lives in their hands when they come out for a ballgame, what with all the flying bat shards, and falling fans....
High School Footage Of Skinny Shaquille O'Neal Here To Make Cavs, Suns, Magic, LSU Fans Weep
Judging by the 8-and-6 he's averaging thus far in the playoffs, Shaq's career seems to be rapidly winding down. Marvel at this 20-year-old footage of him running the break and generally looking like Wilt and David Robinson rolled into one. [NBAOffseason.com]...
Vomiting Phillies Fan's Uncle Would Like Us To Do...Something
Ever since we've started covering the story of Matthew Clemmens, best known for allegedly vomiting on an 11-year old girl, and rocking "Material Girl" at karaoke, his uncle has been pestering us about...well, we're not really sure what he wants....
Matt Millen Apologizes
Matt Millen Apologizes To The Polacks [Tirico Suave]...
Matt Millen Apologizes For Calling Ron Jaworski A "Polack"
In cased you missed it, yesterday Millen was on-air discussing fried bologna sandwiches with Buffalo native Ron Jaworski and said "ask any Polack from Buffalo how they like them, right Jaws?"...
Ridiculous Rain Delay Proves Once And For All That College People Have Too Much Free Time
Florida Atlantic and Western Kentucky were mired in a rain delay of indeterminate length and decided to get a little silly rather than adjust their jocks and spit sun-flower seeds like those layabout MLBers. H/T, like, 15 of you. [YouTube]...
Shaq Lip-Syncs To That One Rick Springfield Song, With Puppets
Shaquille O'Neal loves to have fun, and fun is what you get when you mix Shaq, puppets, and Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl." The only thing missing is a Chinese man named Cosmo lighting some fireworks. [Ustream]...
Family Rushes To Vomiting Fan's Defense In Eminently Quotable Fashion
Now I'm no Perry Mason, but I'd say that if your defense rests in part on there being a distinction between a right person and a wrong person on whom to ralph, your case is lost already....
William Houston Still Shaking His Fist
Angry Billy Houston has a lengthy to-and-fro with Pension Plan Puppets. "Truth is, you're a pathetic piece of shit who can't function as a real journalist so you operate that awful blog," writes the former journalist who now operates a blog. [PPP]...
Apropos Of Nothing, Here's Phillies Vomit Kid Doing Madonna Karaoke
Mean-spirited? Yeah, a little. Only tangentially related to sports? Sure. But fuck it. Here's Matthew Clemmens (stage name: Pukemon) with "Material Girl."...
Strikeforce Post-Bout Brawl Is Childish, Exciting
Jake Shields was confronted during a post-fight interview by Jason "Mayhem" Miller demanding a rematch (Shields beat him in November). Because MMA wants to be the new boxing, their entourages got into it. Bonus: Gus Johnson gets righteous!...
Night On Ubaldo Mountain
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
William Houston Doesn't Handle Criticism Well
Billy Houston, after taking potshots at bloggers in two consecutive posts and catching hell for it, resorts to a totally legitimate journalistic strategy: deleting all the comments on one, and deleting the second post altogether. [Truth & Rumours]...
Willie Colon Had Enough Of Big Ben's "Sausage Party"
Colon said he felt women talking to him to get to Roethlisberger was "gay," and the male-to-female ratio at one club's VIP section was "a sausage party." Well, at least one of them managed to get some that night. [TSG]...
Stories That Don't Suck, With Special Guest Host
Today, our pal Alex Belth, proprietor of Bronx Banter, is taking the reins. He's selected four stories for your enjoyment....
ESPN.com Editors Can't Appreciate A Good Manly Kiss
It's not so much that the image on the front page of Soccernet is Gary Neville warmly congratulating Paul Scholes on his game-winner. It's more that the original filename was "nevillegay" (since been changed to "nevillekiss"). [ESPN.com]...
A Blow-By-Blow Account Of The Vomiting Phillies Fan
In our #tips section, we received a purported firsthand account from someone sitting in the same section as Matthew Clemens, the New Jersey man accused of throwing up on an 11-year-old girl. We reprint it here for your reading pleasure....
Book Excerpts That <em>Do</em> Suck: Rick Reilly® On Chess Boxing
Rick Reilly has farted out a new book, Sports from Hell, and ESPN has a sampling: "Q: What wears one glove, chases queens, and isn't Michael Jackson? A: A chess boxer." [ESPN]...
Bill Houston Has A Wildly Original Insult For Bloggers
Surprise! Some people took issue with Houston's pissy little rant earlier this week. To them (and us), Houston says: "F.U. And say hello to your friends in the basement." [UPDATE: He's deleted the entire column.]...
Jerry Jones Clarifies His "Social Moment," Explains That Bill Parcells Is, In Fact, Worth A Shit
Jerry Jones took the opportunity at a diabetes fundraiser yesterday to explain away his sodden musings on Bill Parcells, and somehow he came away sounding a lot sillier than he did last week during cocktail hour at Ocean Prime....