ill Page 620 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
US Hockey Team Denied Inspiration From '80s Beer Slogan
Because the Olympics just can't handle the in-your-face raditude of America, fuck yeah, they're forcing Ryan Miller and Jonathan Quick to cover up parts of their masks, before the blow the minds of the staid people of Vancouver....
Rick Reilly® Escalates Personal War With Canada
The Rickster apologies for his lame anti-Canuck jokes by crafting even more lame anti-Canuck jokes and sneaking in a brag about the vindaloo-like qualities of his smoking hot wife. Wait until he hears about the electric Zambonis. [ESPN]...
Afternoon Olympic Update: Worst Olympics Ever
It's Day 4 and I'm ready to call it. This Olympics sucks....
Shaq, Dwight Howard Resolve Nerdiest Beef Ever
Howard: "[T]here's no battle of nicknames. I mean, if he wants to be Superman, he can be Superman. But I never tried to steal that title from him or take away anything that he's done for the game." [ESPN]...
Peter King Is Already Manufacturing Dumb Storylines For the 2010 Season
"The logical question for the Saints: Is all this celebrating and spate of parades ... going to go on so long that they affect the Saints' ability to repeat in 2010?" That question leads the league in stupid. [SI.com]...
No, The Sports Fella Did Not Hope For A Dead Georgian Luger
Thanks to the eighty of you who drew our attention to Bill Simmons retro Winter Olympics column, and his hankering for luge accidents. You can stop now....
Bill Plaschke, Master Of Finding Controversy Where None Exists
Plaschke's manufactured outrage of the day: "there was no makeshift memorial of flowers or cards, there was no visible memory" of Nodar Kumaritashvili. The photo that runs with the story? A makeshift memorial of flowers and cards. [MSTI]...
Stories That Don't Suck: Death On The Track, Ebert's Silence, NASCAR's Backlash Ethos, Bubba In Love
Every week, I'll excerpt a handful of stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that I urge you to read for one reason or another. Send any suggestions to [email protected]....
Wade Phillips Cuts A Rug In Miami
Super Bowl parties aren't all hookers and cocaine; sometimes they're about middle-aged white coaches awkwardly doing group dances. The YMCA has never been so simultaneously wholesome and icky. (Video is rated debatably SFW, for graphic scenes of Wade Phillips dancing.)...
Track's Safety Was Already In Question Before Fatal Crash
When Nodar Kumaritashvili died in a training run this morning, it came after years of hype of the fastest, most dangerous downhill run in the world. No one wants death, but we all want the athletes to risk it....
Last Night's Winner: Whatever Passes For Roy Williams's Conscience
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the little man on Roy Williams's shoulder, who prevailed upon the coach to say he's very, very sorry....
Godwin's Law Strikes The SI Swimsuit Issue
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
JuCo Coach Goes After Refs, Gets Cuffed
A coach and one of his players were arrested while confronting referees after a loss. Women's junior college basketball fever: catch it!...
Lindsey Vonn Has A Lot Of Nerve Getting Hurt After Being So Sexy
Lindsey Vonn sure is purty, but who does she think she is? Getting everyone all hot and bothered over our Yankee Doodle Dandy and then having the audacity to break her shin before winning any gold medals! What a tease....
Rick Pitino Dismisses Reports He Will Soon Be Doing His Humping On The Floors Of New Jersey Diners
The New York Daily News reported this morning that the priapic Boy Genius had "intermediaries" contact the Nets to express his interest in the team's coaching job. Pitino managed to deny the story without referencing 9/11 once. Good for him....
Roy Williams Is A Clueless Dick
North Carolina head coach Roy Williams has previously demonstrated his complete lack of perspective on more than one occasion, but he still wants you to know that the Haitian earthquake was nothing compared to losing to Virginia at home....
Roddickless: Even <em>Sports Illustrated</em> Prefers Brooklyn Decker To Her Husband
We learned yesterday that Brooklyn Decker, who doesn't play a sport, has now appeared on more Sports Illustrated covers than her husband, Andy Roddick, who occasionally plays a sport very well....
Athlete Dong Is The New Celebrity Sex Tape
Before nude photos surfaced, only devoted NBA fans knew who George Hill was. But after — we all know his name. This can only be good for his career, and we will only see more athlete dong in the future....
Pretty Lady Will Be On Cover Of Sports Periodical
Brooklyn Decker is the cover model of SI's ever-quaint Swimsuit Issue, which will also feature scandalous daguerreotypes of Lindsey Vonn, Ana Ivanovic, and other bathing beauties in their swimming-suits. [Sports Pros(e)]...
Marisa Miller Was Also Wearing A Jockstrap During The Beach Football Game
That is all. (Thanks to Gamboa Constrictor for his citizen journalism.)...