k Page 3447 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Andrew Bynum Does His Best To Let Us Know He's Not Doing His Best
So one night after they were beaten by the lowly Pistons, how exactly did the Lakers blow a 21-point lead to lose to the even lowlier Wizards? That mutiny that seems to be building among the players over coach Mike Brown? The obvious tension between Brown and Kobe Bryant? The distraction of the cons...

"It Ain't Midnight Yet, Y'all!" High School Hoops Announcer Loses His Mind Yet Again
Bravo, Brian Snow. We didn't think there was any way you could top last Friday night's trachea-shredding performance, as the Marist RedHawks hit a late three to win the 4A regional final over Curie, 63-62. No, there was no way you could top that one. ...

Harvard Is Going Dancing Too, Though They Were Studying When They Found Out
There's no video of Harvard celebrating winning the Ivy League (which has no postseason tournament) and thus earning their first ticket to the NCAA Tournament since 1946. That's because it happened last night when Princeton beat Penn, and Harvard players were in the library studying for midterms. ...

Montana Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the Montana Grizzlies , who in beating Weber State 85-66 won the Big Sky tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN2]...

The Data Behind Yu Darvish's Brief But Devastating Debut
Texas Rangers hurler Yu Darvish made quite the spring training debut today against the San Diego Padres. (Of course, he cost the team more than $107 million, spent the last seven years pitching competitively in Japan, and these were the Padres, so you'd think he would do OK.) Still, thanks to some f...

LIU-Brooklyn Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the LIU-Brooklyn Blackbirds , who in beating Robert Morris 90-73 won the NEC tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN2]...

Lehigh Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the Lehigh Mountain Hawks, who in beating Bucknell 82-77 won the Patriot League tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [CBSS]...

Does Peyton Manning In A Yankees Jersey Mean He's Thinking About Playing For The Jets?
Or is the fact that he was 5 years old at the time just mean he's ready to conquer kindergarten? Also, Archie's pants....

Hockey Dad Says He Wasn't Being Malicious When He Shined That Laser Pointer In A Little Girl's Eye
Joe Cordes, 42, admitted he shined a laser pointer onto the ice during last week's high school girls hockey game between Winthrop (Mass.) and Medway-Ashland (Mass.). The parents of the freshman goalie for Medway-Ashland had said their daughter complained of headaches afterward. Cordes, whose daughte...

Slam Cover Goes Retro, With Rubio and Love As Marbury And Garnett
Slam's Farmer Jones has a lovely story on what it took for Kevin Love to earn this honor—a year-old promise that if he could average 20 and 15, the cover was his. Love somehow did it, but these days you can't do a T-Wolf without including Ricky Rubio. So the two recreated a famous 1997 cover, featur...

Lenny Dykstra's Accountant Wanted To Launch A Charlie Sheen Energy Drink
The latest issue of Sports Illustrated has a feature by David Epstein about the human flotsam that is Lenny Dykstra, who was sentenced on Monday to three years in California state prison after pleading no contest to grand theft auto and filing a false financial statement. Epstein spoke with an LAPD ...

New Illinois Football Coach Using Porridge As Punishment
This is how Tim Beckman hopes to rid the Illini program of the taste left by Ron Zook's seven seasons in charge:...

The Guy From The Dropkick Murphys Would Like You To Know He Didn't Really Say Jonathan Papelbon Couldn't Use His Entrance Music
Yesterday, ESPN Music(?!) reported that Ken Casey, vocalist for the Dropkick Murphys, did not want Jonathan Papelbon using his old entrance song. That song, "I'm Shipping Up To Boston," is reserved for the Red Sox closer, Casey supposedly said, and now that Papelbon is in Philadelphia, he's no longe...

Marlins President Calls Miamians Stupid, Jose Reyes Greedy
If you know anything about the sweetheart deal the city gave the Marlins to build a new stadium, you know team president David Samson basically bent Miami over a pinball machine and had his way with it. But he's far from done with the humiliation—with his remarks to a gathering of local business lea...

Dancing Canucks Kid Is Sexy And He Knows It
Even less concerned with the judgment of strangers? The guy behind him, drinking his Mike's Hard Lemonade. [via Hot Clicks]...

Two Rec Hockey Leagues Kicked Out By Town For Rampant Smoking, Drinking, "Torn Rectum"
Up in Kingsville, Ontario, they skate hard, and they drink hard. Too damn hard for the folks at Kingsville, who evicted two men's leagues from their arena after months of shenanigans. Yes, it's beer league hockey. But it's not cigarette league, or drunken brawl league, or beer bottle up the anus lea...

Jakub Voracek Used To Have Cognitive Abilities, Until Niklas Kronwall Exploded Him
Philadelphia's Jakub Voracek skated directly into a Kronwall, which, from the point of view of physics, isn't much different from skating into a brick wall. Voracek was clearly out for a few seconds, going directly into the always-terrifying the fencing response. No penalty was called on the play,...

Don't Ask Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke About His Job Security
That's what John Moore of Newstalk 1010 did yesterday, albeit by first noting that "a lot of people" think Burke ought to be fired. With even Don Cherry calling Burke out for, of all things, not stocking his roster with any Ontario natives, it was worth asking Burke about what kind of pressure he m...

Usain Bolt Vs. Prince Harry In The 25-Meter: Who Ya Got?
If you picked the one wearing the Jamaica shirt—you'd be right, actually, despite his gingerness. It's just good form to let royalty win. Even Princess Diana's riding instructor used to let her be on top every once in a while....

South Dakota State Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the South Dakota State Jackrabbits, who in beating Western Illinois 52-50 in overtime won the Summit League tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN2]...