like Page 34 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night
What you missed while telling the Pope to stay off your lawn ... • NBA: Lakers cross the Rubicon, take control of Western Conference. • NHL: Taking a 3-0 lead and then giving up four unanswered, in the playoffs? That's gotta sting a little. Flames 4, Sharks 3. (Hmm, I think we may have identified th...
About Last Night
What you missed while ghost riding the pony... • NBA: Denver needed a win to stay a game up on the Warriors, but instead they had their asses handed to them by the Jazz. • Boxing: Alfonso Gomez is probably penning a thank you note to last night's ringside doctor. • MLB: Johan Santana can give up hom...
The Usual Dash Of Dollar Dog Night Bacchanalia
Wednesday night at the Philadelphia Phillies Citizens Bank Park marked opening night and its first official "Dollar Dog NIght" promotion, which culminated in a Phillies 1-0 loss and, as usual, another mesmerizing display of shit-faced chaos courtesy of the revved-up monkeys. Ever since the Phillies...
It's TV or Nerd SimCity, Your Choice
One wonders if Dungeons & Dragons creator Gary Gygax was a big sports guy — we're gonna assume "no" until his estate can prove otherwise — but even he would admit there's a hell of a lot of actual worthwhile games today. The Rockets try to continue their winning streak against the Lakers. The SEC ch...
ESPN Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Bring Back The Fightin' Christians!
So here's an underdog story that makes all others look wan and thirsty by comparison. Elon University — which as you know is in North Carolina — is one win from making it to the NCAA Division I Tournament. This despite sporting a 14-18 record, having a student population of just 5,000 students, and ...
About Last Night
What you missed while attempting to shake the cops with blown tires....
Whither Sports Unfiltered With Dennis Miller?
There's nothing sadder than a big blank space where your cable show's programming schedule used to be. Exactly what fate has befallen Sports Unfiltered with Dennis Miller, the Versus series that made America fall in love with elephant polo references once again? It's a mystery (for some reason, Vers...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Whoa! I Can't Even Tell Them Apart!
Tyler Pratt — um, pictured left — sent a photo of himself in to some Patriots look-alike contest saying people tell him he looks like Tom Brady. Apparently, Tyler Pratt works in a cave ... with blind people ... who are horrible fuckin' liars....
Rick Majerus Should Probably Just Stop Referring To The Groin Area
You thought Rick Majerus was just in trouble for pulling out his penis in front of his players. Nope! He made the tiny mistake of expressing his views on abortion....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why Bec Hewitt is getting less face time than her sister-in-law... ...
Rick Majerus Will Show You His Billiken
I'm not sure what the monster is supposed to be in Cloverfield, but it can't be any more horrifying than this. From the pages of Sports Illustrated, via Larry Brown Sports, comes Tales of Nude Rick Majerus. Apparently the Saint Louis coach loves being naked, and it's not the good naked, as Seinfeld ...
Patriots' Fans Have Delicate Sensibilities
Patriots fans were shocked and indignant when Anna Grant, 14, was booed for wearing a Patriots jersey at the AFC playoff game in Indianapolis on Sunday. Folks at the RCA Dome let her have it during the introduction of the Punt, Pass and Kick winners, where, it appears, even the Colts' mascot got int...
Dana Jacobson Has The Sole Appropriate Reaction To The Mike And Mike Roast
Last Friday night, they held that "Mike And Mike Celebrity Roast" thing in Atlantic City. It was about as entertaining as you'd expected it to be, according to the Press Of Atlantic City. (No offense to Trey Wingo, but when you host half the show, and the other half is hosted by Jeffrey Ross, you're...
Welcome to Wild Card Weekend
Praise Jesus, Adonai, Allah, Buddha, Vishnu, Yaweh, Zeus, Odin, Bill Brasky, and their father, Tim Tebow. The NFL Playoffs arrive today and my preferred team will be kicking things off in about four hours. Seattle have the honor of hosting the early game and the weather is about what you'd expect. T...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you realize that you're a myth and Bigfoot is real ... • Boxing: Heavyweights, Dominic "Fainting Spell" Guinn vs. Robert "The Missouri Migraine" Hawkins, Vancouver, British Columbia (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • College football: Champs Sports Bowl, Boston College vs. Michigan State, Orlan...
In A Way, Aren't We All John Maine?
For years, we have been plagued by the scourge of John Maine impersonators. We have fallen prey to this ourselves; heck, just more than a month ago, we thought Maine had shown up at our door, asking not for a dress, but for candy. One would think we would have learned to have been more skeptical....
It Would Take Your Mother One... No, Two... Hours To Watch Bowling
• 12:30 p.m. — Movie: Napoleon Dynamite [Comedy Central] • 1:00 p.m. — Bowling: PBA Great Lakes Classic [ESPN] • 1:00 p.m. — Movie: White Men Can't Jump [A&E] • 2:00 p.m. — Skiing: FIS World Cup, tape delay [NBC] • 2:30 p.m. — Golf: V Foundation Celebrity Classic [ESPN2] • 3:00 p.m. — Golf: Father/S...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning for its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......