park Page 44 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....

Rangers Ballpark Almost Got Swept Away By Tornadoes Last Night
During the wave of tornadoes that swept the Plains last night, a few touched down in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Damage and casualties were limited, but there were some scary moments as a line of storms approached Rangers Ballpark in Arlington in the middle of the game....

Here's The Voice Of Oregon State Sports, Drunk And Eating A Napkin At Denny's
This video's been floating around for a couple months under the description Drunk Man Eats Napkin At West Hollywood Denny's at 3:10 am. But this week, some folks near Corvallis noticed the subject looked a little familar. And indeed, it's Mike Parker, the radio play-by-play guy for the Beavers. Wh...

It Was Wrestling Mask Night In Anaheim
Your morning roundup for May 11, the day the pre-prom body cavity searches were called off....

Philly Gave Jayson Werth A Conflicted Standing Ovation Last Night
Jayson Werth, D.C.-area multi-millionaire, had his first at-bat at Citizens Park since the December 2010 deal last night. He was treated to a standing ovation of sorts, one that was one-part mostly-genuine strained clapping and one-part all-out disgusted booing (which quieted, slightly, when he ti...

Teenager Robs, Carjacks PNC Park Usher, Leaves Him To Die
This story is all kinds of horrifying. And, yeah, in part because we've seen how many cops are present at Pirates games to tase drunk folks....

The Cavs Got Their 15th Win Last Night, And It Happened To Be Over The Miami Heat
The Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Miami Heat at home last night, 102-90, for just their fifteenth win of the season. For the 51-23 Heat, who clinched a playoff spot over two weeks ago and just have to survive the remainder of the season without a significant injury, this was really just another sli...

It’d Take Trey Parker A Million Years To Lose, And Other Statistical Oddities Of <em>BASEketball</em>
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today: The offensivel...

When The Ex-NFLer Fought The Struggling Writer Over $28
Remember Anthony Parker? Yeah, me either. But the former 49ers and Raiders cornerback sic'ed his lawyer on a freelance writer he stiffed out of $28. Wouldn't it have been cheaper to just pay the money from the beginning?...

Arrowhead Parking Lot Orgies Are More Common Than One Would Think
As many Kansas City radio deejays desperately search for the couple in that photo up above, one commenter pointed us to a Craig's List posting from last week which may lead to some answers — or more questions....

Big Ben Successfully Keeps His Brains From Leaking Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tony Parker Makes Split From Eva Longoria Official-Official
This is not a photo of him celebrating his new-found freedom to sport-hump. This is actually from their pre-wedding yacht orgy or whatever it was where X17 paparazzi lurked. For divorce details, TMZ Sports has all your legalese....

Eva Longoria's And Tony Parker's Roller Coaster Photo Is What We Call Foreshadowing
In happier times, the new couple took in some wholesome fun in Las Vegas. Only later would they realize they were riding a giant metaphor....

What Are You Going To Do, Charge Lindsey Vonn With Smoking?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Eva Longoria Divorces Tony Parker Over Affair With Brent Barry's Wife, Reports Guy From <em>Saved By The Bell</em> And Other Journalists
So Longoria split from Tony Parker, and there are rumors of a fling with a teammate's wife. We're confident running with this, because it's being reported by some of the top names in sports media....

Adam Dunn Close To Accepting Birthright As DH
Adam Dunn's about to hit a lot of doubles. The Rays might be hoarding Uptons. Ladies and gentlemen, please stand back, because this is one HOTFUCKINGSTOVE....

Tony Parker's And Eva Longoria's Bland Fairytale Comes To An End
Parker filed for divorce yesterday from his wife of three years. Spurs games just became less interesting, if that's possible. [TMZ]...

Sparky Anderson Dead At 76
Anderson died this morning shortly after being placed in hospice care. He managed three World Series champions, and was elected to the Hall of Fame in 2000. [AP]...

The LeBron James Commercial Gets The South Park Treatment
Last night's South Park featured this spoof of LeBron James's recent commercial. It features BP CEO Tony Hayward intercut with other characters in the midst of existential crises....

Sun Devil Makes Sweet, Public Love to Himself
According to tipster Evan, this is a photo of "Sparky with a boner doing push-ups" after a score in yesterday's riveting Arizona State/Portland State game. He was particularly entertained by guy and lad watching. Me too....