pbl Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Blatter Admits Qatar World Cup May Be A Mistake, Throws Shit At Wall
Even if you ignore the rampant bribery allegations, the 2022 World Cup in Qatar is already a massive clusterfuck. This is in part because the World Cup is set to take place in June or July, and summers in Qatar are really, really fucking hot. Like, way-too-fucking-hot-to-play-soccer hot. Now, FIFA p...
Someone Hacked FIFA President Sepp Blatter's Twitter Account
About 30 minutes ago, the following tweet was sent from FIFA president Sepp Blatter's Twitter account....
![Here's An Easy Trick For Blocking All Bleacher Report Results From Your Google Searches [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18az2kwuroyzljpg.jpg)
Here's An Easy Trick For Blocking All Bleacher Report Results From Your Google Searches [UPDATE]
We've all been there: Googling for news on, say, RGIII's knee only to find 873 SEO-optimized posts from Bleacher Report crowding out actual information. Posts like these:...
What Is A Chop Block, Anyway, And Why Was Last Night's Call Against Seattle A Bad One?
Barry wrote earlier about the safety Niners coach Jim Harbaugh declined in last night's game. The safety would have made the score 15-6 rather than 13-6, and would have pleased those who wagered on the Niners (who were -7 at most books) and vexed those who wagered on the Seahawks. Barry also noted...
The Steelers' Larry Foote Told The Replacement Refs "You Should Go Kill Yourselves"
You know the replacement referees are a debacle when a player gets injured on a dirty play that wasn't flagged, and no one notices because it wasn't even the worst uncalled dirty play of the quarter....
FIFA Can't Even Properly Ban Corrupt Executives
Let's make this clear: No one believes Mohammed bin Hammam, the FIFA executive committee member instrumental in bringing the 2022 World Cup to his native Qatar, didn't bribe people. It's still pretty much accepted that bin Hammam was the brains behind the envelopes full of cash handed out to represe...
FIFA Mandates World Cup Drunkenness
At long last, we've identified the one cause FIFA will fight for: The right to sell their sponsors' beer....
FBI Investigates Russian Plot To Hack World Cup Bids, And Other FIFA-Related Treachery
When the wining World Cup bids were announced last year, it was hard not to wrinkle a Corrugator supercilii muscle. Russia had beat out luckless England for the 2018 World Cup. Even weirder was that Qatar had triumphed over the mighty USA for 2022. Now a squad of FBI agents attached to the "Eurasian...
Sepp Blatter "Deeply Regrets" Suggesting That Racism In Soccer Can Be Settled By Handshakes
Last week, for the 739th time, there were calls for Sepp Blatter's resignation following a fresh round of insensitive remarks from the FIFA president. In two separate television interviews, Blatter denied that there was any racism in soccer and then suggested that players settle their differences ...
Two Members Of An Extremist Right-Wing English Group Occupied The Roof Of FIFA Headquarters Today
Security must not be very tight at FIFA headquarters in Zurich because two members of the notorious right-wing English Defence League took to the roof of Sepp Blatter's palace to protest FIFA's recent and—it must be acknowledged—very stupid decision to prevent English players from wearing embroidere...
Disgraced Ex-FIFA VP Plans To Disgrace FIFA President With "Tsunami" Of Corruption Charges
FIFA, if you are so inclined to take notice, is potentially in the midst of a total organizational breakdown, because we're now hearing what we already knew all along: FIFA is very corrupt. This is a special breakdown, though, because it is one in which the accused person in power attempts to deflec...
Obese Santa Claus Lookalike And FIFA Whistleblower Chuck Blazer Gracefully Exits CONCACAF While Being Investigated By FBI
Chuck Blazer, if you recall, is the FIFA executive who went public with bribery accusations against Mohammed bin Hammam, the only rival to Sepp Blatter during FIFA's presidential elections. (The charges torpedoed bin Hammam's candidacy.) Blazer is also the number two at CONCACAF. But not for long. T...
FBI Investigating Obese Santa Claus Look-Alike And FIFA "Whistleblower" Chuck Blazer
Quick recapitulation: In May, Chuck Blazer, the lone American on FIFA's executive committee, alleged that Mohammed bin Hammam, who was running against Sepp Blatter for the FIFA presidency, had offered bribes to members of the Caribbean Football Union in exchange for votes. Blatter seized upon the op...
FIFA Opted Out Of Denouncing Homophobia Because They Couldn't Get Beyoncé To Perform
There was an awkward double-booking in Berlin two weeks ago: the host city for the 2011 Women's World Cup had promised use of Brandenburg Gate — located in the city center — on Saturday, June 25, to both FIFA organizers and to the annual gay pride parade. If you know anything about FIFA's tolerance ...
Here's A Photo Of A Prominent Public Figure Glad-Handing A Brutal Despot
This image is cause only for despair. Can you believe Robert Mugabe would shake this man's hand? For shame. We've witnessed this kind of debasement before, when Russian crime figures, vile dictators and Michel Platini have lowered themselves to drinks and smirks with Sepp Blatter. On Monday, Blatter...
This Is The Lone American That Stands Between Soccer And Total Corruption
A lone wolf. An avenging angel. A force for good and justice in FIFA. Chuck Blazer, American hero....
FIFA Does Not Care For You Or Your Religion
FIFA has a lot of problems right now, and given that Sepp Blatter has enlisted Placido Domingo and Henry Kissinger to solve them, they're not gonna get solved....
Sepp Blatter's "Council of Wisdom" May Include...Placido Domingo?
Previously in our Sepp Blatter is a loathsome historical figure series, we likened the Swiss dictator of FIFA to a wicked American president and a murderous Chilean general. But where does one go with the news that Blatter now wants a Spanish opera star to help him clean up corruption in FIFA? This ...
Chile To Investigate Pablo Neruda's Death; FIFA-Adviser Henry Kissinger To Investigate His Navel
A judge in Chile just ordered an investigation into the mysterious death of poet Pablo Neruda, who supposedly succumbed to prostate cancer 12 days after a Henry Kissinger-backed right wing coup installed a hideous dictator who brutalized and slaughtered his own people for years. The circumstances su...
War Criminal To Advise FIFA On Compliance
Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, newly re-installed FIFA dictator Sepp Blatter has announced that that avatar of moral probity, Henry Kissinger, will advise FIFA's new corporate governance and compliance body from his seat on a "committee of wise persons."...