penn Page 47 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night...
• WNBA. Phoenix 92, Houston 75. Penny Taylor captures the world's imagination with 26 glorious points. Or, just scores 26 points. • MLB. Cincinnati 5, St. Louis 1. And at the midpoint of their season, the Reds are just 19 games under .500. • Arena Football. Columbus 56, Tampa Bay 55. This is as exci...
JoePa Will Put Your Ass To Work
We love Joe Paterno. Whereas many coaches would discipline their players for a campus fight by suspending them or — more likely — not doing anything at all, the Penn State legend is forcing them to clean the inside of the stadium....
Everybody Should Have A Nittany Lion At Their Party
Looks like when it's offseason at Penn State, it's pretty tough for the beloved JoePa to keep a firm grip on the ears of his players. Because some Nittany Lions could be in some serious trouble after a weekend altercation....
Roll On, Eighteen Wheeler, Roll On
We're actually big fans of the huge semi trucks that college football teams use to transport all their equipment from game-to-game; when we went to the Rutgers-Illinois game this year, we actually waved to the guy driving the Illini truck. Illinois had lost 33-0, and he grouchily nodded back. At lea...
NCAA Pants Party: Texas A&M Vs. Pennsylvania
Texas A&M Aggies (25-6) vs. Pennsylvania Quakers (21-8) When: Thursday, 2:40 p.m. Where: Lexington...
Pennsylvania Quakers
FIVE REASONS TO PICK THE PENN QUAKERS AS YOUR SLEEPER...
We Have Dancing Quakers
You can start filling out your tournament bracket ... at least one tiny little inconsequential part of it. The Pennsylvania Quakers have let their Inner Light guide them into the NCAA tournament. With their 86-58 win last night over Yale, Penn becomes the Ivy League champ, and thus, the first team t...
Tommy Lasorda Wants You To Know He Doesn't Pay For Sex
There's disturbing, there's terrifying, there's soul-destroying ... and then there's learning that Tommy Lasorda is mentioned in a new book as a frequent customer of a call-girl service....
I Wish You Wouldn't Kill Anthony Morelli
Penn State quarterback Anthony Morelli has received death threats via e-mail, for infractions way less severe than going to the Barbaro message board and wishing out loud that the horse would die. No, some jack-ass Penn State fans want him dead because he's only thrown for 2,227 yards and 10 touchdo...
Pointing Out The Idiocy Of A New Rule
A truly outstanding find from The Wizard Of Odds: Apparently, during the Joe Paterno broken leg game between Penn State and Wisconsin — JoePa's return has been pretty amazing, by the way; the guy's coaching this week — Badgers coach Bret Bielema either discovered a loophole in the controversial new ...
Thinking Good Thoughts For JoePa
If you haven't seen the "highlight" yet, here's video of Joe Paterno's broken leg accident on Saturday. We are extremely fond of Paterno — we always find him lovable; we want him to read us a story or something — and hope he has a speedy recovery, or as speedy a recovery that a 79-year-old man can h...
We Have Ways Of Making Your Mascot Talk
Oh, those crazy Ivy Leaguers. What won't they do in the name of ribald gridiron revelry?...
I Don't Think This Is What Lil' Jon Had In Mind
Illinois, despite holding a second half lead, couldn't hold on to beat Penn State today, but if you're an Illini fan, take heart. At least it wasn't your fans in that video....
Tommy Lasorda Is Not "Smart"
Big ups to Sports By Brooks, which has unearthed a gem of an audio clip: Our pal Tommy Lasorda absolutely freaking out on a radio host for, uh, pointing out that he was sleeping during a baseball game earlier this year....
NCAA Pants Party: Texas Vs. Pennsylvania
Texas Longhorns (27-6) vs. Pennsylvania Quakers (20-8). When: Friday, 9:50 p.m. Where: Dallas....
Pennsylvania Quakers
1. Their Home Court Is Famous, And Not Just For Hoops. The Palestra: Penn's home court, often mentioned in hallowed tones, referred to by some as the most historic fieldhouse in all of college basketball. It's home not only to all of Penn's games, but many of the classic Big Five rivarly games as we...
Joe Paterno's Slip Of Tongue (Ugh)
It's a nice time to know Penn State coach Joe Paterno ... unless you're a woman, says the National Organization of Women. The organization has taken issue with Paterno's comments about Florida State linebacker A.J. Nicholson, who was accused of rape in a Florida hotel room. Here's what JoePa said:...
Some 1 A.M. Bowl Goodness
We're never reminded more of just how old we're getting than when we watch college freshmen play sports. Penn State kicker Kevin Kelly, we swear, has to be lying on his birth certificate; there's no way he's older than 12. The poor kid finally erased the chances he'd be a Buckner-type goat by fina...