Oklahoma City Thunder rookie Perry Jones III loves pizza rolls. Our source for this? Perry Jones III.
Tim Lincecum's seemingly harmless demeanor is inexplicably making this poor kid above freak the fuck out. Isn't it adorable when kids are frightened for no visible reason?
The terrifying weapon above is Big Bella, the Philadelphia 76ers' t-shirt gun (or so they claim). It can shoot 100 t-shirts in 60 seconds. Fans will probably be too busy ducking in fear to catch anything, though.