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A Special Sunday Syllabus: Today's Guide to Ignoring the NFL
Below you'll find some great and required NFL reading from around the interwebs, for all the time you will spend not watching football today. Dig in!...

Soccer Gots Brain Dingers, Too, Y'all: How To Ignore Football Today
So, here's a common refrain down in the comments of these Sunday punch-bowl poop posts: DURR THEY GOT CONCUSSIONS IN SOCCER TOO Y'ALL DURR DON'T THAT MAKE Y'ALL A BUNCHA HYPOCRITES DURR....

"We Want Colt! We Want Colt!": Your Guide To Ignoring The NFL Today
In a recent Washington Post poll, 65 percent of respondents predicted that someone not named Robert Griffin III will be Washington's starting quarterback in 2015. What's awful about that is not the majority, but the probability that they're right....

Principles of Player Safety: A Guide To Ignoring Football Today
If you buy the notion that the NFL can use penalties to curb the kind of violence that causes brain damage, this would appear to be the kind of hit that deserves, well, something. Terrence Brooks launched himself into an unprotected Delanie Walker and the resulting impact left Walker with a conc...

Disposable Feature Backs: Today's Guide to Ignoring the NFL
Let us discuss the absolute bullshit that is the rookie wage scale and the NFL's terrible non-guaranteed contracts....

The Wussification Of America: Today's Guide To Ignoring Football
What follows are excerpts from a New York Times article entitled "The Homicidal Pastime":...

Cowboy Down: Today's Guide To Ignoring The NFL
Maybe you're not especially moved by Roger Goodell's smug, shitty, pinch-faced crookedness. Maybe the particulars of the NFL's ridiculous personal conduct policy just don't rate. And maybe the whole concussion thing—I mean, yawn, right? Surely there is one thing we can all agree on, and it's that Da...

Damn Those "Fickle Beasts": Your Guide to Ignoring the NFL Today
Rookie wide receiver Kelvin Benjamin of the Carolina Panthers suffered a concussion on his team's final offensive play of Sunday's 37-37 tie with the Cincinnati Bengals. But at the time of the hit, Benjamin was cleared by the NFL's sideline concussion protocol. No concussion had occurred, it said. ...

Low Socks and Chop Blocks: Why And How To Avoid Watching The NFL Today
So, you may have heard, the NFL fined Colin Kaepernick $10,000 for wearing the wrong headphones to a post-game presser last Sunday....

Counterprogramming Football: What To Watch Today Instead Of The NFL
In evaluating the NFL's concussion protocol, it's important to look at why concussions are dangerous in the first place. For helpful perspective on this, let's step away from football and look at a much more direct activity centered around doing awful damage to an opponent's brain: boxing....

Counterprogramming Football: What To Watch Today Instead Of The NFL
So, here we are at Week 4, roughly the quarter mark of the NFL season and the first round of bye weeks. Bye weeks were introduced to the NFL schedule in 1990 as a way of extending the regular season, and teams use the time to make roster changes, occasionally fire a coach or two, and, most importa...

Counterprogramming Football: What To Watch Today Instead Of The NFL
Lost, perhaps, in all the discussion of the NFL's handling of domestic-violence cases is the question of just why in the hell the NFL is punishing its labor force under something called a "personal conduct policy" in the first place. Just what the hell's going on there?...

Insidious Hypotheticals: A Guide to Ignoring the NFL Today
So, here's the question, and it's a good one:...

The Best of NFL Counterprogramming: Week 1
The NFL sucks. Watch this instead....
![How Did This Girl End Up At A New York Hotel With Mark Sanchez And Tim Tebow? [UPDATED]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/180udcnkp7hxijpg.jpg)
How Did This Girl End Up At A New York Hotel With Mark Sanchez And Tim Tebow? [UPDATED]
Those intrepid internet lurkers over at Busted Coverage found this one, and we have to agree: Once we saw these photos and considered where they came from, all we were left with were questions. The photos were tweeted by a girl who appears to have been visiting New York City this weekend from parts ...

Your Super Bowl XLV Pregame Show Open Thread
Four-and-a-half hours of pregame coverage is about to start on Fox. Water torture for the brain. So, here's a collection of Super Bowl XLV stories that have filtered in over the course of the past few days....

Look, Jackasses, KU Played Today. What The Shit Did You Expect?
Your beloved Comment Of The Week segment will appear Monday....

It's Giant Balls Vs. Dwight Schrute For Hearts And Minds On Super Bowl Sunday
In a bold frontal attack that makes Pickett's charge look like a game of Red Rover and the Normandy Invasion seem like a visit from the grandparents, ABC will storm NBC's programming fortress on Super Bowl Sunday with the intent of stealing ever viewer possible. Their weapon? The obstacle course she...

Well, As Long As It's Done Tastefully
I have seen the future of reality TV, and it is Hurl! You may have already heard of this show, which debuts on G4 July 15: Contestants gorge themselves, competitive eating-style, and then are placed on devices such as a mechanical bull to see who will throw up last. (Christ shakes head sadly, offici...

Eli Manning Sent To Room With No TV
So Fox affiliate WLUK TV-Green Bay has this convoluted plan to get under Eli Manning's skin this weekend, as you may have heard. Someone told station GM Jay Zollar that Manning is fond of Seinfeld, so Zollar is pulling the show from the station's schedule on Saturday. Remember when no one cared what...