psy Page 4 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How The Media Keep Getting Joe Frazier Wrong
Lawdy, lawdy Bob Lipsyte is great: "This glorification of Smokin' Joe actually began several years ago with documentaries and books that used him as a vehicle—not always unjustified—for attacking Ali. Once again, Joe was the opponent, not the headliner. Those who reviled Ali as the symbolic hero of ...

What Jock Culture Does To Pukes Like You
The following piece originally ran in The Nation's sports issue, on newsstands now....

My Lunches With Costas: A Series Of Frank Encounters With The Journalist And Shill (UPDATE)
The following is adapted from Lipsyte's new memoir, An Accidental Sportswriter, now available on Amazon....

An Analysis Of Steve Nash's Emotions As He Becomes The Latest Nicki Minaj Lap Dance Victim
First, Chris Paul. Now, Steve Nash. Is no point guard safe from Nicki Minaj's candy-colored backside? Regard Nash's face as he receives a "lapdance" from the songstress last night at U.S. Airways Center. There is much to learn here about human behavior....

The Dave Duerson Autopsy Report Is Predictably Heartbreaking
The Miami-Dade County medical examiner has released her final report on the death of former NFLer Dave Duerson, who shot himself through the heart last month and instructed that his brain be donated to head trauma research. Confirmed by the report is that Duerson complained of "memory loss and inabi...

Some Pussy In Oregon Picked The Packers To Win The Super Bowl
But the fact remains this: the last round of cats to battle for the right to play prognosticator probably ended up in a bag at the bottom of the Green River thanks to the degenerate gambler who believed the Oregon over Auburn pick....

Skittish Soccer Analyst Completes Self-Psych-Out
Retired German soccer player Mehmet Scholl has seen Sky Sports' Jessica Kastrop getting pegged with an errant ball one too many times it seems. In related news, "Scholl" is German for "the yips." [SI's Hot Clicks]...

Monday Morning Psychologist, With Dez Bryant And Roy Williams
Actual headline from actual newspaper: "Dez Bryant Refuses To Carry Roy Williams' Shoulder Pads." So while this may not be a big story, the media's damn sure they're going to make it one. So let's analyze!...

First 150 Fans To Have Seizures Get A Free Hot Dog!
The Hudson Valley Renegades have an interesting sponsor for fireworks night. Comedy pyramid? Comedy pyramid. Do work, people. (H/T William M.)...

Shaq Lip-Syncs To That One Rick Springfield Song, With Puppets
Shaquille O'Neal loves to have fun, and fun is what you get when you mix Shaq, puppets, and Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl." The only thing missing is a Chinese man named Cosmo lighting some fireworks. [Ustream]...

Live Chat With Sam Lipsyte
Sam's down in the comments, awaiting both your observations on America's sham meritocracy and your penis humor. Go say hi. Don't forget to read the excerpt and buy the book....

Excerpt From <em>The Ask</em>: "... And I Pictured Titboning Vargina In A Rare Books Room"
Below is the first chapter of The Ask, by Sam Lipsyte, our funniest and foremost chronicler of fuck-up Americana. Read it and come back at 3 p.m. for a live chat with the author in a followup post....

Join Us Thursday For A Live Chat With Sam Lipsyte, Author Of <em>The Ask</em>
We'll have an excerpt Thursday from the great Sam Lipsyte's new novel, which is very funny and which I encourage you to read immediately. Sam will be by around 3 p.m. to say filthy things to you and discuss aggressively marketed nachos....

The Olympics Were Basically A Two-Week Freudian Therapy Session
NBC's final tally, via Slate's Sap-o-Meter: 107 combined mentions of "father" and "dad," 103 of "mother" and "mom," and 64 mentions of "dream" (the single sappiest word of these Games). How does that make you feel? [Slate]...

In Praise Of Team Spicoli
I have a new favorite Olympian, and he is the guy who, when asked yesterday how it feels to be a member of the U.S. snowboarding team, responded with the following bit of bongwater poetry:...

The Real Reason Michael Phelps Won't Meet With the Pope
It's not because he got high (as we all know, the Pope smokes dope). The reason famous fish-person Michael Phelps won't meet with the Nazi Pope is buried deep in his family history, as revealed on his Wikipedia page....

Sports Psychologist Takes Full Credit For Stewart Cink
Who is really to blame for "stepping on a Hall of Famer's neck" and ruining golf forever by not laying down for Tom Watson. Not that jerk Stewart Cink. Send a note to Dr. Morris Pickens, famous sports psychologist, instead....

Maybe This Is Why They Called Him "The Lip"
We're bringing back our popular "Dark Side of the Locker Room" series, which you'll remember was a compendium of journalists' bizarre, amusing and previously undocumented encounters with athletes (and often athletes' genitalia). Got a story? Send it to [email protected]....

Mariotti Offers A Comforting Hand To Kornheiser, Himself
Shouty Jay Mariotti says he'll miss Tony Kornheiser on MNF, a man with whom he feuded cattily for indeterminate reasons over the years. This seems mystifyingly bighearted until you realize he's actually writing about himself....

Volleyball Fainter Is Fine, Thanks For Asking
Watching Nikki Allen, USC's director of volleyball operations, talk...stagger...sway...timmm-ber!...is a vintage YouTubian moment which will undoubtedly follow her around for years. Thankfully, she's fine — she was just a little nervous and jet-lagged....