rist Page 118 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Down Go the Liverpudlians!
Hey, wow, Liverpool lost to, uh, Barnsley. That sounds like an upset, I think. Don't ask me, I'm a red-blooded blinkered American simian who don't truck no foreigner sports. I'm sure the losers all groused and said things like "poxy" and called each "prats" and ate bad food with their jagged teeth. ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while planning a vacation to Bill Simmons' "Mount Rapmore"...
If You Can't Play As The Vikings, Might As Well Ransack Like Them
Having just been alerted by the Mid-Atlantic Hockey League that their season was over at the halfway mark, the Jamestown Vikings decided that they were still vikings after all and proved as much by trashing the historic Viking Lodge in Jamestown, NY....
Rams' Lawyers Attempt to Do What Team Could Not
It's two weeks after Losergate (or, if you will, Super Bowl XLII) and people are still making a hue and cry over cheating charges leveled at the now-humbled Patriots. The latest comes from former Rams player Willie Gary and two Rams season ticket holders, who are suing the Pats, seeking $100 millio...
Ook-ook. You Folks Ready to Go Ape?
Greetings, Deadspinners. I am Christmas Ape, the latest in a glorious succession of Kissing Suzy Kolber writers to serve as your Weekend Editor. Those of you who are regular readers over there probably know me for chronicling the imaginary exploits of Philip Rivers and posting the occasional picture...
About Last Night
What you missed while finding Jesus in a block of wood ... • College basketball: Are you a referee who suspects that he may have OWS (Overactive Whistle Syndrome)? Please consult your physician immediately. Or, you know, get a job driving a cab. Georgetown 55, Villanova 53. • College hockey: Beanpot...
Christian Group to Protest ESPN Tomorrow Over Culture of Insensitivity
It seems the latest round of Berman videos was enough to prompt a return trip to Bristol for angry Christians. A press release reveals all of ESPN's sins that need to be addressed and protested tomorrow at noon:...
This Guy Hasn't Washed His Face Since 2004
They've announced the villain in the next Batman movie, and this one's the most insidious of all. His powers include super smugness, a photographic memory that does not include anything prior to 2001, and invisibility (should the conversation turn to the Bruins). Only posted comment to his photo so...
All Hail The Loathsome Ronaldo
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Good Morning From Post-Christmas Haze
OK, so everyone has survived Christmas, yes? We didn't get much; we're a grownup now, so instead of getting Transformers toys, we get luggage. It came in handy; we do have a rather long trip coming up....
Merry Holidays, Everybody!
OK, so we're sorry you were stuck at work all day today: Obviously, we feel your pain. But regardless, it's time to go home now and get Santa drunk....
Dan Shanoff's Yearly Christmas Tome
Continuing a Christmas tradition on Deadspin (and, before that, other fine holiday establishments), Dan Shanoff presents a special holiday poem, dedicated to the many reindeer who pull the Deadspin sleigh — usually drunk, stoned or otherwise on crack. Happy holidays!...
Tebow Wins Heisman, Loves Jesus
I didn't watch the Heisman Trophy presentation show (what's the point?) but I've been assured that Tim Tebow did in fact win. As a Gator fan of some 20 years I'm quite happy for Superman, but I'm not going to bludgeon you over the head with my homerism the way Tebow does with all of that god talk. O...
The Ugly American Watches Futbol
Kristen Pettit is a book editor — actually, she's our book editor — and took a trip to Buenos Aires last week, where she witnessed the glory of a La Boca soccer game. Her amusing report from the front lines is after the jump....
It's Scary Down There In Baton Rouge
Last weekend, the genius that is Orson Swindle at Every Day Should Be Saturday attended the Florida-LSU game in Baton Rouge. We've never been to an SEC football game, but, man, do we want to now. We've never heard a better description of the madness of college football Saturday in the South than thi...
It's Time for Sunday Night Football in U.S. America (This Time on Sunday!)
After getting through Thursday night's season kick-off with John Madden only drawing one penis on the screen, Eli Manning is hoping he'll pick up the slack for this evening's tilt, as Manning's Giants travel to Texas Stadium to wage battle in a manner most NFC East with the Cowboys....
More Late Game Bukkake
San Diego 14, Chicago 3 LaDainian Tomlinson made up for a fallow first half with a flush fantasy second, throwing for one touchdown and rushing for another, but still managing only 25 yards on 17 carries. Tommy Harris can jump offsides all he damn pleases, it's still not making up for a parlous Bear...
Tomlinson Rushes Not Exactly Like Nike Zoom Commercial
All possessors of the first pick in their fantasy football leagues would like to have a word with LDT at the moment, as the reigning NFL MVP (though Pacman Jones is the raining NFL MVP) has 12 yards on 11 carries in the first half against the Bears....
Sunday Game Update Bukkake
Apparently the Patriots are good (but we still hate them). Randy Moss hauls in nine for 183 yards and all the white Patriots fans can glory because Wes Welker got in the endzone as well. Did Belichick shake Mangini's hand? Do I care? Well, actually — no, I mean, no....
Legislating From The Luxury Box
Before the 1978 season, the NFL's owners passed a shit-ton of rules that were designed to scale back the role of physical contact in the game. Under the new rules packages, wide receivers could not be bumped more than five yards from the line of scrimmage. Offensive lineman were allowed to use your...