ryan Page 135 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The End Of Shaq Is Nigh
We couldn't have been more thoroughly depressed by last night's Lakers-Heat matchup, otherwise known as Shaq-Kobe II (or IV, or whatever). Aside from the much-heralded but mostly boring "peace accord" between Shaq and Kobe, and aside from the game itself (the Lakers finally beat Shaq), we were dow...
Look Out For The Black Mamba. (Relax, We Don't Mean Literally)
We hate to be the ones who have to point this out, but after all we've made fun of him for — with our personal favorite still being Chuck Klosterman's notion that the Lakers are like "an eighth-grade intramural team which happens to have one kid with a mustache" — it's worth noting that the man no...
Fiction Is Actually Stranger Than Kobe's Truth
Further showcasing the almost impressive casual racism of the porn industry, a reader sends us the link to this very special porn film: Tobey Bryan's Backcourt Violation, from our classy friends at Hustler....
Culpepper: Lap Dances? Who, Me?
We don't want to overstate — and it probably won't happen, anyway — but if Vikings sex boat gods Daunte Culpepper and Bryant McKinnie get their way, we might be in for the real trial of the century....
The Vikings Meet The Seventh Floor Crew
Sometimes, someone comes up with a concept that's so perfectly in our sweet spot that we can merely stand up and salute, and that's really saying something, because we spend the whole day on our ass....
Your Takes On The Sex Boat Wrapup
We love doing this site, but, to be honest, what we might love the most are you, the readers. Your comments are the highlights of our days, and not just because you're funnier than we are. We thought we'd take this opportunity to showcase our personal favorite slices of hilarity from today's earli...
The Full Report On The Sex Boat
So, hey, anybody else actually dug into these whole Vikings criminal complaints, the ones The Smoking Gun grabbed? If you haven't yet, we suggest you do, because it's even more entertaining than you thought. But, we understand, you're very busy at work today. So allow us to help you out. We've dug...
Kobe's Four-Year Moratorium On The Word "Sex"
Quote: "My nose is a little crooked, man. I'm normally super, super sexy. I'm just super sexy now." — Kobe Bryant, after being kicked in the face by the Timberwolves' Anthony Carter...
Give Us Your Best Skip Bayless Stories
We've received a lot of feedback about our selection of The Boston Globe's Bob Ryan as today's bad hometown columnist, which can be broken down into the following percentages:...
Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Bob Ryan
By all accounts, Bob Ryan was once a good writer. But then something happened. The molten lava, burning his features. The painful reconstruction. The cryptic words: "Rise, Lord Vader." Yes, Bob Ryan's journey to the dark side is now complete. With his ubiquitous presence on Around the Horn and Par...
Kobe Has A Run In His Protective Gear
We share YAYSports!' fascination with Kobe Bryant's tights, or his protective garb, or whatever the hell they are. It appears Kobe's tights — which clearly aren't constricting his ability to shot the ball 40 times a night — are now available for purchase on Nike's Web site for a mere 35 bucks, and...
Don't Forget About The Sex Cruise!
While the rest of us sully our filthy little minds with stories of lesbian cheerleaders, The Mighty MJD is keeping his eyes on the prize of the whole Vikings sex boat story. (How quickly we forget ...)...
Problem Is, He'd Keep Missing The Ribbon With The Scissors
From famed (and much better at this whole business than we are) New York blogger TMFTML, in response to the news that former quarterback bust Heath Shuler is running for Congress, floats the glorious notion of a Ryan Leaf candidacy....
Kobe Bryant And His Leggings
YAY!Sports points out something we don't think anyone else noticed: During last night's thrilling Lakers' win over the Nuggets, Kobe Bryant — who, it seems is somewhat less than popular in the Denver metropolitian area — apparently was, uh ... wearing tights....
Much Respeck For TNT
We have to give the mad propers to TNT, which is promoting its upcoming NBA television schedule by giving their promos to the great Ali G. The hysterical faux hip-hopper interviews Lakers "star" Kobe Bryant and Esquire's Chuck Klosterman subject Steve Nash in commercials that YAYSports! helpfully ...
Ryan Church, Theologian
Because we love baseball so much, we sometimes forget that the average athlete often lacks some basic education on fundamental issues. Take Ryan Church, Washington Nationals outfielder. As reported by The Washington Post — that is to say, he told this to a reporter — Church went to his team's chap...
Blogdome: Ripping Favre
• So, hey, now that we think about it ... Brett Favre was kind of a dick to Javon Walker. [Sports Frog] • Hot new hockey site launching later today, by tapped-in anonymous blogger. Hey, it's a growth industry; hockey can't get any less popular. [HockeyBuzz] • Ryan Howard is the Dontrelle Willis of h...
We're Not Sure Whom We're Supposed To Hate
David Pinto at brings up something we were kind of curious about: If admitted steroid abuser Jason Giambi hits a home run off suspended steroid abuser Ryan Franklin (which he did last evening), uh ... whom are we supposed to get mad at? Would Nationals manager Frank Robinson say it just didn't ha...
Nothing Says Christmas Like A Good Blood Feud
God Bless The NBA. For the second consecutive year, commissioner David Stern and Co. have put together a Miami Heat-Los Angeles Lakers Christmas Day matchup, allowing broadcasters Al Michaels and Hubie Brown to look for significance in each sweat bead on Kobe Bryant's brow and each slight tilt to...
Guess The Kobe Bryant Activity
In this photo, Kobe Bryant and his wife are:...