sat Page 23 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jeff Garlin: “This Is The Longest Rape Has Ever Been A Topic For Anything I’ve Ever Discussed”
This week's Deadcast guest is "Curb Your Enthusiasm" co-star and producer Jeff Garlin (Listen here, iTunes here, buy Jeff's standup DVD here). We talk rape! Far more than Jeff prefers!...

Mad Dog Goes Rabid, Needs To Be Put Down (SECOND UPDATE)
What can only be described as one of sports talk radio's most epic meltdowns happened two days ago. But since it happened on satellite radio, nobody knows a got-dang thing about it....

The Best Damn Sports Show Shuffles Off This Mortal Coil
Fox's "The Best Damn Sports Show Period" will hold its last show tonight after 8 years of wacky on-air sports-related hi-jinx and absurd athlete-celebrity couch pairings. Watch Charissa Thompson and Chris Rose get weepy....

Aw, Man...That's My Dad
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Monday's Lax Final Set, No One Outside Upstate New York Notices
Syracuse slams Duke in the Greg Paulus Bowl, Cornell shocks — shocks! — No. 1 Virginia in the nightcap. There really is nothing going on today. Softball on ESPN, lacrosse on ESPN2, Bernie Williams playing jazz on YES. Plus, Daulerio's making a packing list and checking it twice. [ESPN]...

Reporter Sees Rat, Freaks Out In Exact Highly Amusing Way You'd Expect
The above video, featuring Comcast SportsNet's Capitals reporter Lisa Hillary suffering a highly entertaining, if ultimately non-life-threatening, heart-attack while being terrorized by a Verizon Center rat, represents our first exposure to playoff hockey in years....

Minus The Beard, His 40 Time Would Have Been Much Faster
Seriously. You should read Clay Travis' combine draft novella that Fanhouse has been serializing. [Fanhouse]...

ESPN Headline Writers Are Witty Rapscallions
Well isn't that special. But in ESPN's defense, there's probably not a whole lot you can do with news like this. [ESPN]...

For Great Quality At A Low, Low Price, Come On Down During Aaron Curry Discount Days
Aaron Curry is shopping himself to the Lions via text message — which technically is SPAM — telling general manager Martin Mayhew he can be had for a song if he chooses him No. 1....

But Pirates Are So Popular Right Now
"The paid attendance of 8,790 was the sixth-smallest in PNC Park history, the smallest having been 8,201 from the April, 25, 2007. Actual turnstile count was roughly 4,500." [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, TwoBigBoobs]...

The Most Interesting Spring Football Game Commentary You'll Ever Hear
Radio station Rock 104 live-streamed the Southern Miss Golden Eagles game for its hometown fans on Saturday, but those tuning in received something else entirely: Hillbilly sex talk, belching, and the N-word....

Chances Are, You'll See This At The NFL Combine In 2010
Matthew Stafford's football-skeeting is pretty amazing. That's not supposed to sound pornographic. [Jimmy Fallon]...

The Phillies Dedicate The Pre-Game Smoke To Harry The K
At least, I hope that's the case. Phillies are playing Nationals right now with heavy hearts, wheezing lungs. [Player Hater's Ball]...

Defeated Soccer Team Welcomed Home With Cheers, Death Threats
This Argentine squad arrived at their home airport after a rough 2-0 defeat to a Mexican team that knocked them out of a major international tournament, a loss so crushing that their manager resigned after the game. It was such a tough road environment that fans at the game in Mexico were chanting d...

Officer Who Stopped Ryan Moats Cries No Mas, Quits Dallas PD
You've seen the video, you've marveled at the tattoo. But you won't have Dallas police officer Robert Powell to kick around anymore; his attorney announced today that Powell has resigned....

Loyal Fandom, Taunting Or Performance Art?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

The Low-Grade Acid That Is The Iditarod
The great Alaskan sled dog race is in 2/3 of the way through, which means most of the participants are frost-bitten, sleep-deprived zombies tripping on their own brain fluid....

Pat Burrell Says Thank You From The Bottom Of His Dong
Just like Trevor Hoffman did after leaving San Diego, Pat Burrell took out an ad to say goodbye to the fans who booed the crap out of him for most of his career....

Guess We All Owe Dubai An Apology
Everyone (i.e., me) rode the United Arab Emirates for denying an Israeli tennis player entry to their country, but judging by Sweden's reaction to a similar problem, the Mid-East nation looks like the sensible one....

Getting To Home Plate With Alyssa Milano ... Discuss
It's time for Waxing Off, the Deadspin feature recommended by four out of five dentists who chew gum. This week: Alyssa Milano and her soon-to-be-released book, Safe at Home....