stock Page 7 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A's Pitcher Dallas Braden Goes A Little Crazypants At A Community Meeting In His Hometown
A public meeting was held in Stockton, Calif., last night in order to address the town's high crime rate. That's not something that would normally register on our radar, but when Dallas Braden decides to show up at that meeting with a baseball bat and berate the police chief until he gets himself k...
Dear Women: Someone Wrote A Terrible NHL Lockout Column About You
Everyone: try not to kill your own grandfather, because we have apparently been transported back to the 1950s, where women are barefoot and pregnant and the biggest casualty of the NHL lockout is wifey, at her station in the kitchen, struggling to keep "hubby" happy....
Five Years After The Dallas Cowboys Fumbled It Away, Cowboys.com Is Now A Male Dating Site
It's easy to think that by 2007, most professional sports teams had figured out this whole Internet thing. Yeah, funny thing about that, since one of the great examples of dot-com incompetence occurred back then, as Jerry Jones and his Dallas Cowboys organization could've snagged Cowboys.com and bee...
Somebody's Been Peeing In A Minnesota High School Girls Soccer Team's Lockers
Pee! Pee everywhere! That's what girls from Princeton (Minn.)'s soccer team say they found in their lockers Saturday morning. The pissing bandits haven't been identified, but here are the facts: Princeton's football team played host to Mound Westonka (Minn.) last Friday. Mound Westonka's team used ...
Marathoner Sets Course Record, Is Named Winner, Realizes He Accidentally Ran The Half-Marathon Route
Yesterday looked like it was going to be a hell of a day for Olok Nykew, a 37-year-old St. Paul man who was running the Sioux Falls Marathon. Barely tired, Nykew suddenly spotted the finish line ahead, with no other runners around him. Had he really run 26.2 miles? It didn't feel that way, but the c...
Catholic School Cheerleader Hazing Involved Poopy Lap Dances, Claims This Anonymous Letter Placed In Mailboxes Across Town
Reitz Memorial High School, in Evansville, Ind., bills itself as "providing an exceptional educational opportunity," while offering "a Christian community where young people are valued and cherished." The 87-year-old school has a rich sporting tradition—Tigers teams have won numerous state titles in...
FUCK YEAH! IT'S THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!
Holy shit! It's here! It's finally here! The first day of school! SOMEONE PINCH ME ON THE ASS SO I KNOW IT'S REAL!...
The Time Has Come For America's Flight Attendants To Shut Up
I think we can all agree that the emcee-ization of America's flight attendants has grown steadily worse over the past decade. And today, reader Kurt has sent us (and Gawker) arguably the nadir of flight attendant pep talks. I must warn you in advance that these will be among the two most painfully a...
Olympics Brand Police Not Happy About Athletes Humping With Unauthorized Condoms
As we've seen again and again (and again), the London Organising Committee of the Olympic and Paralympic Games (LOCOG) protects Olympic sponsors with the ferocity of a mother bear protecting its cubs. That extends to condoms: when Australian BMXer Caroline Buchanan tweeted this picture of "a bucket ...
On His Way Out The Door, Ryan Lochte Admits He Pees In The Pool
This has been reported all over the place, usually without much additional comment, and Lochte has yet to clarify that he was joking, so I guess it's a real thing. From TVGuide.com:...
The Olympics Opening Ceremony? Giant Voldemort Fighting 30 Mary Poppinses, Obviously
London's Sunday Times is reporting that Friday's Olympics opening ceremony may not be unwatchably boring. According to Yahoo, which excerpted parts of the Times' subscription-only story, a 40-foot Voldemort (hologram? parade float? ventriloquist's dummy?) will take center stage for the ceremony and ...
Stop Filming Your Kids Crying Over Sports
Here's a little girl in tears over Ichiro Suzuki being traded away from the Seattle Mariners. We've been sent this video a few times, and we'll take the chance to address this now, rather than respond to each individually: We don't care about your or anyone else's little kids crying over sports....
Minor League Coach Banned For Full Year After Intentionally Losing 18-Inning Game
Two weeks ago, the Stockton Ports lost 7-6, in 18 innings, to the Modesto Nuts. It wasn't a typical game for the Athletics' Single-A affiliate. For one, the regular manager was on vacation, leaving former MLB player and current Oakland hitting instructor Todd Steverson in charge. For another, it wen...
Congratulations To Bleacher Report On Its $200 Million Acquisition: Slideshow
In honor of Turner's nearly finalized $200 million purchase of Bleacher Report, here's a congratulatory slideshow, featuring a bunch of pictures of burning money. Please click through....
No, I Will Not Fix The Overflowing Toilet Today: The Dadspin Father's Day Manifesto
Father's Day is a con. Every year, I expect to have a Father Day's filled with unlimited blackjack and gunfire-scented cologne, and every year it ends up being like every other goddamn NFL-free Sunday in existence. Father's Day is supposed to be MY day, but most of the time my family abandons any pr...
Company Paid To Monitor College Athletes' Twitter And Facebook Accounts Has A Sock-Puppet Business Address IRL
Last month, we met three firms that colleges are using to monitor athletes on Facebook and Twitter. It's ethically and procedurally dubious work, so you might assume the companies would be extra-scrupulous about how they run their own businesses....
Car Cuts Across Infield To T-Bone Rival Racer, Drivers Get Out And Fight
Not many details on this, other than it comes from Saturday evening at the Sportsdrome Speedway in Jeffersonville, Ind., a track that features front-wheel drive and figure-eight racing, two of the more amateur and collision-friendly forms of stock car racing. I don't know what the green car did to...