that Page 35 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Randy Moss To The Patriots. We Still Don't Believe It.
As we await the inevitable Bill Simmons column about this — Five Tool Tool goes ahead and sums it up for us — we continue to watch our mind boggle over the notion of Randy Moss playing for the Patriots. We've never found Moss as annoying as, say, Terrell Owens, but he's hardly what we think of when ...
Introducing Tony Dungy's Least Favorite Sports Mascot
If the March Gayness blog pool at the Malcontent needs a costumed mascot, well, Flamy is available at very reasonable rates. Come to think of it, if he has the time, he could also be a fine representative of Manny Ramirez's grill-hawking efforts, or the next phallic-shaped object for golf's Christie...
The Eye Of The Tiger Will Save A Serbian Village
Zitiste is a small Serbian town with a population just over 3,000. I guess the village is only mentioned in the news when they're hit with floods, and they're getting tired of it. To counteract this, they're spending money on not some sort of drainage or irrigation system, but... a big Rocky statue....
When Will The Media Elite Stop Tearing Down Our White Heroes?
Every debate needs comic relief, and God bless him, Rush Limbaugh is always good for that. The former director of promotions for the Kansas City Royals in the early 1980s, and at one time the word's fifth-leading importer of OxyContin (behind Brazil), Limbaugh has become in recent years obsessed wit...
Hey, Why Is Kenny Chesney Suddenly Calling Me?
In our original neck of the woods in Mattoon, Ill., NFL loyalties are rather split. Some people root for the Chicago Bears (four hours away), some root for the Indianapolis Colts (90 minutes away) and some odd souls hopped on the Rams bandwagon (two hours away). (Some insane people stuck with the fo...
About That Glogging Thing ...
As many of you know, while the rest of you were all out enjoying cool icy beverages and collectively mocking Carlos Mencia commercials over spinach dip during the Super Bowl last evening, we were in our dark apartment, tapping out the live "glog" at CBS Sportsline. We were reminded that there's a re...
If You See These People At Large, Turn Them In IMMEDIATELY
Sure, you might look at this picture and think you see the kindly, warm-hearted parishioners of The Fall Creek Baptist Church in Indianapolis. It might make you feel warm; it might make you long for home. You might see nice old ladies during an Hawaiian-themed event. You might see that....
The NBA's Shame
I've been critical of David Stern and his obsessively fascist measures to cultivate a friendly, lilly-white non-threatening image for the NBA, but perhaps I was misguided on that....
Ice Jumping Seems To Be Rather Important In Norway
As you might have suspected, we do not speak Norwegian; we're not even that fluent in Swedish Chef. So we're going from a rough translation here, but apparently a Norwegian women's ski jumping team is in trouble for punishing poor jumps by punching the offender in the face....
CBS SportsLine Discovers The Barbaro Message Board
Displaying the same keen journalistic instincts that brought the world Spin on Sports, CBS SportsLine did some real digging over the holidays and discovered that, apparently, some middle-aged women are e-mailing Barbaro....
Good Morning: Hold Everything You Love...Deadspin Returns to the Super Bowl
Greetings, Spinheads. Today's our final day together, and before we break out the huffing supplies and begin a rousing game of alligator fuckhouse, I have a quick announcement: I'd like to let all parties in the Miami area know that I've once again been permitted to display my on-the-scene reporting...
A Call Out to Objectify This Man's Wife
From the Letters to the Guest Editor department:...
About Last Night
What you missed while you were trying to nail your girlfriend on your parent's couch while watching Prime. •College football: I wanna be a cowboy, baby. I can smell a pig from a mile away. • NBA: Nowitski...goooood! • College football: Rutgers caps off memorable season with win in bowl game that wil...
Oh Miller Don't Wanna Dance With Somebody
And thankfully, I won't have to watch him feel the heat with somebody. With somebody who (somebody who) loves him. Sigh....
This Guy Is Very Excited About Ken Williams' Offseason Moves
It's a Christmas Miracle! Ladies and gentlemen, we present you with the spiritual brother of our friend Mike Cooper ... meet Ryan Drop....
That Thar Deer Has Some Extra Appendages
Rick Lisko is a bearded Wisconsin mountain man who doesn't love much more than busting out his bow and slicing away some deer. But his biggest catch was a deer he hit with his truck; it turned out to have seven legs and both male and female reproductive organs....
So This Is What They Mean By A Friendly
We're no experts — perhaps Mr. Hirshey can help us out here — but we do know that this is just all kinds of wrong....
Ten Moments That Will Make You Cry
Just to be cruel to our delicate sensibilities, the fine folks at Chowdaheads have compiled the 10 most gruesome broken arms and legs in sports history. You can probably guess what No. 1 is; the video above is, frighteningly, only No. 3. (The anticipation in this clip is too brutal for us to handle....
Blasted Apart, With Just A Hint Of Juniper
Ladies and gentlepersons, we proudly introduce you to SeasonShot. What is it? It's a shotgun that saved you the trouble of having to spice your meat! You can blast a bird out of the air and lightly pepper it with coriander at the same time! We'll let the inventors describe it:...
Is It Too Late To Cast Tom Cruise?
We missed our copy of ESPN: The Magazine this week, so we didn't catch this terrifying, surreal tidbit, but the fine folks at Dirty Laundry did:...