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Who's The Worst ESPN Personality Of Them All?
The folks at BravesBeat are making the world a better place. They have created an official 64-man tournament bracket to decide who exactly the most loathsome ESPN personality is. It's a doozy of a bracket: No. 1 seeds include Stephen A. Smith, Chris Berman, Stuart Scott and Dick Vitale. (No. 2 see...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while setting up the world's longest line of dominos ... oops. · Armstrong can now drink a margarita out of a different Tour de France trophy every day of the week. · Busch wins Pennsylvania 500, Wallace second after stopping for a family of ducks. · Ben Crane shoots 69 to win US Ban...
Leftovers: NHL, Players Hold Hands, Make Love
NHL players, owners officially engage in hot makeup sex. [NHL.com] You are not a Jedi yet: Creamer stomping Wei at LPGA Evian Masters. [Hawaii Channel] Selig to make ruling on Rogers, then duck quickly. [MLB.com] Dean Wormer gives Royals pitcher 10-day suspension. [Kansas City Star]...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as the Oompa Loompas do your household chores ... Dodgers at Mets. Jeff Weaver vs. Victor Zambrano for all the marb ... for, ah, third place in their respective divisions. PGA U.S. Bank Championships: "Gambling is illegal at Bushwood Sir, and I never slice. ... Damn!" Foot Fetish: NE R...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while impassionatley engaged in the fight, for your right, to paaaaaarrrrrty. · Guerrero Slams Yankees: We'd make a "Touched by an Angel" reference here if it wasn't so lame. · Brown, Isiah Meet. Strangely, the open Knicks job never comes up. · Armstrong emerges from mountains with y...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your speedboat is being repossessed ... Yankees at Rangers. If Steinbrenner acts quickly, Griffey could be on a plane for this one. From France, the LPGA Evian Masters. Whoa, Lance Armstrong playing through! Washington D.C. United at Kansas City Wizards. May be blacked out in the Ka...
Leftovers: The Scandal Of The Feet
Sandalgate: U.S. lacrosse team sparks national outrage. [Indianapolis Star]Knicks, Brown reportedly to talk on Thursday. [New York Daily News] U.S. receives highest FIFA ranking ever. [MSNBC]...
How To Make Everyone You Know Want To Kill You
In a description of the upcoming ESPN Mobile program, which will give Sprint customers easier access to sports scores while they're bashing their phones against their heads because they're not working because they're Sprint, ESPN Mobile senior vice president Manish Jha described some of the other ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed during your frenzied scramble to buy every Wonka Bar in town ... Schilling gets first save since '92, but let's be honest, it was against Tampa Bay. Lance Armstrong facing little resistance as he approaches Paris — kind of like the Germans in WWII. Pistons fire Larry Brown, official...
ESPY Mania!
Are you like us? Did you spend last night with your eyeballs rubber-cemented to the television screen, desperate to see who was going to win the ESPYs? Could Lance Armstrong three-peat? Who would win craziest play? What exactly does Curt Schilling look like in a tux? These are important questions....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while secretly reading your child's Harry Potter book in the basement ... Tiger Woods smooches British Open trophy, uses a little tongue. Top of the Tour, ma! Lance Armstrong increases overall lead. Royals, Tigers in ugly brawl. Ron Artest suspended just out of habit....
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as authorities string police tape across your porch ... Cardinals at Giants. Scenic panorama includes San Francisco Bay and the lovely BALCO Laboratories. PBA's Motel 6 Roll to Riches. What, you were expecting the Waldorf Astoria? Woman, I told you not to bother me during the PGA John ...
Leftover: LeBron's New Best Friend
Cavs finally find playmate for LeBron; Cavaliers back up the truck, dump loot all over Larry Hughes' front yard [Cleveland Plain-Dealer] The dance ... she is over. Cuba blames U.S. for Olympic baseball snub. [MSNBC] Stotts, the beer ... er, coach who made Milwaukee famous. [Milwaukee Journal-Sentine...
About Last Night ...
What you missed in your obsessive frenzy to make the world's largest ice cream sandwhich ... · U.S. pummels tiny, defenseless Carribean neighbor in Gold Cup soccer. · Baseball, softball axed from Olympics, joining former events tug-of-war (1900-1920) and club swinging (1932). · Yankees' Giambi nudge...
To Watch Tonight ...
Your TV pulls you from the real world with its flickering, hypnotic caress. Don't be afraid. · Indians at Yankees. This series is your last chance to see Derek Jeter until after the All-Star break. Poor dope. · ESPN Bowling Night. Yes, you're watching bowling on television. How sad is that? · PGA Jo...
Leftovers: Pedro's Midget To Miss Beautiful Detroit
· Pedro Martinez thinks this All-Star thing is just a passing fad. [MLB.com] · NBA update: Redd turns down the glamour of Cleveland for the glitz of Milwaukee. [ESPN] · Like, I'm so sure: Wie draws biggest crowds at PGA John Deere Classic. [Golf Digest] · Larry Brown says he just wants to coach Pist...
About Last Night ...
What you missed due to the Cartoon Network's hastily scheduled Gumby marathon ... · Runtime Error: Jeter snubbed by online All-Star voters · Panama beats Colombia in Gold Cup soccer, as if you didn't know. · New Yorkers stunned, disoriented as Mets end Hernandez's 2 1/2-month win streak....
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as New York makes plans to get the 2040 Olympic Games ... · Cubs at Braves. Everyone expecting to play tonight take a step forward. Not so fast, Derek Lee. · WNBA All-Star Game: Courtside celebrities to include Jim Belushi, Frank Stallone. · Goooooooooo Gold Cup: Colombia vs. Panama at...
Leftovers: Kenny Is Vewwwy Sawwwwy
· Kenny Rogers apologizes to ballpark paparazzi everywhere. [San Francisco Chronicle] · The last roundup? Schilling heads to bullpen. [Keep Your Sox On] · Armstrong continues his 3,607 kilometer victory lap at Tour de France. [NY Times]...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while transferring all your "White Shadow" episodes from VHS to DVD ... · Boston's Manny Ramirez just loves to show off with the bases loaded. · Horry, Spurs reach accord. Can world peace be far behind? · Healthy at last, Josh Beckett leads Marlins to ... no wait, he's hurt again....