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Happy Bobby Bonilla Day! The Mets are still paying $1.19M each year to a guy who retired decades ago
July 1 in baseball is Bobby Bonilla Day, when the Mets pay $1,193,248.20 to their former third baseman, who hasn’t set foot on a major league diamond since 2001, as part of a deferred payment plan. It’s a check the Mets have been cutting annually since 2011, and they will send a seven-figure sum to ...

Google's Smart Compose Is Shitty And Definitely Evil
Not satisfied with foisting predictive text and Smart Replies upon an unsuspecting public, Google rolled out a new Smart Compose feature for mobile Gmail two months ago that, like your significant other interrupting you, storms right ahead and puts words in your mouth. Like so:...

My Kids Won’t Stop Gaslighting Me<em></em>
If you’ve been around these internet parts for the past few years, you know all about gaslighting, wherein people stand behind a lie so fervently that they compel others to believe it as well, leaving marks unsure as to what is true and what really is the name of Apple CEO Tim Apple....

Matt Nagy Was Not Happy That Cody Parkey Went On The <i>Today</i> Show
Double doink artist Cody Parkey joined Today on Friday to talk about moving forward with his life and his career after costing his team a playoff win in the most devastating possible way. Parkey held his head high, telling the hosts he wasn’t completely gutted by the double doink because “football’s...

Fiancée Of White Sox Pitcher Jace Fry Appears To Nuke Their Engagement Via Instagram
White Sox pitcher Jace Fry got his first career start Wednesday, against the Indians. It wasn’t a real start—the White Sox tabbed this one as a bullpen game, and Fry only pitched one inning—but, hey, a career first! Meanwhile, while he and his teammates were out there getting pounded by the Indians,...

These Photos Of Tony Parker In A Hornets Uniform Do Not Look Right
For a part of the NBA season that is not strictly a part of the NBA season, this is a pretty entertaining part of the NBA season. Teams don’t begin training camp in earnest until today, but Monday was media day, which meant players wearing their uniforms around team practice facilities, getting phot...

The Best Of MLB Photo Day 2018
MLB Photo Day has once again come and gone. A non-scientific survey of the resulting images suggests there’s an increase in bespectacled pitchers, which is great because they look that much funnier giving up a long home run. Here are some of the best photos to hit the wires in recent days....

The Best Of NBA Photo Day 2017
NBA teams have taken their requisite pictures which can be disseminated in promotional materials you’ll probably throw away almost immediately, but it’s unfair to condemn the practice of making enormous people pose in dumb ways with balls, since the result is so wonderfully goofy. Here are, for one ...

Does This Look Like The Reincarnation Of Lou Gehrig To You?<em></em>
You’ve spoken to a toddler, or at least know enough about children to imagine what speaking to a toddler might be like. You understand that a 2-year-old child, because his brain is still developing and he is just starting to experiment with language, is liable to say some dumb things. A toddler migh...

The Best Of MLB Photo Day 2017
The results of this year’s MLB Photo Day have been submitted to the Getty Images wire, and once again, professional baseball players who would rather be anywhere else have been subject to awkward poses for future media guides. Here are some of the best ones....

Idiots Argue Modern Ballplayers Are Fat In Stupid <i>USA Today</i> Op-Ed
Two professors and the CEO of a weight-loss company published an op-ed in USA Today—based on their recently published research letter—arguing that the vast majority of baseball players are too fat, and that they “owe it to themselves and to the children who look up to them as role models” to get in ...

Brewers Minor Leaguer Can't Stop His Ridiculous Laugh
We went over the best pictures from MLB Photo Day over here, but what Brewers prospect Brett Phillips did needs more than one frame....

The Best Of MLB Photo Day 2016
MLB Photo Day is the best source for photos of MLB players looking visibly uncomfortable. A small percentage of the players embrace the situation as best as they can, like Nick Swisher. Let’s look at some others....

Did Dana White Confirm That He Pays <i>USA Today</i> For UFC Coverage?
Within mixed martial arts circles, it has long been taken as a given that the UFC pays USA Today for coverage. As the rumor goes, the UFC buys advertising from USA Today with the tacit understanding that USA Today will cover the sport, and do so favorably....

MLB Photo Day Never Disappoints
This is the week when most MLB teams have their official Photo Day, meaning that we have once again been graced with a bunch of pictures of professional athletes looking like awkward eighth-graders. We browsed through a bunch of this year’s crop and found our favorites. Blue Jays catcher Jack Murphy...

Janay Rice Says Ravens Told Her To Apologize At That Press Conference
The first half of a two-part interview with Ray and Janay Rice aired on this morning's episode of the Today Show. Ray Rice wasn't present for this portion of the interview, and instead we saw Matt Lauer conduct a sit-down with Janay and her mother. The most revelatory part of the conversation was wh...

Paula Deen Wint Awn <em>The T'Day Show</em>, Is Still Grosser 'N Shit, Yawl
Crazy-eyed butter-marm Paula Deen took to The Today Show this morning, ostensibly to talk about life lessons and learnin' from mah mistakes, yawl and other such nonsense, but really to promote her dumber-than-hell ill-conceived new subscription-based online network. ...

The Rangers Took Their Team Photos In The Bathroom
Most MLB teams have held their photo days, and a few gems have emerged. But really, the true story each year is which team will be forced to get their photos taken in the bathroom. Congratulations, Texas Rangers!...
