too Page 27 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Parents Name Baby Wrigley Fields. Seriously
Look, if you didn't want your kid to amount to anything in life, you could have just stamped the word LOSER on his forehead in indelible ink; or left him on the doorstep of Green Party headquarters. But Paul and Teri Fields of Michigan City, Indiana just had to get creative, and so they decided to n...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as all the verbs in your term paper prepare to go on strike ... • MLB: Milwaukee at Atlanta. No, Atlanta Braves; I am your father. Search your feelings; you know it's true! [ESPN] • College football: Oklahoma at Tulsa. The Dust Bowl? [ESPN2] • Golf: Nationwide Tour, Albertsons Boise Op...
About Last Night
What you missed while playing full-contact Scrabble ... • College football: Miami bids farewell to Thursday nights at the Orange Bowl by squeezing the pulp out of Texas A&M. • MLB: Brett Tomko is winning games? Seriously? Padres within a half-game of Diamondbacks for NL West lead. • Cycling: Oscar P...
Appalachian State Fans Are Still, Well, Appalachians
We can understand that Appalachian State fans would want to remember their upset victory over Michigan forever, keep it close to them so that, in moments of despair, they can remember that anything is possible, that the world can be a transformative place. (Particularly when Michigan is terrible.) B...
Dance, Marshall Fella, Dance
Last night, in Huntington, W.Va., the Marshall football team hosted a Women's Clinic, meant, apparently, to explain to feeble minded babymakers the basic concepts of football so that they will understand when to leave the room, when to leave the house and when to just bring more beer. It's not easy...
Actually, It Kind Of Reminds One Of The NFC West
Because college football season is almost here, and because I can already picture Joe Paterno leading a player around by the nose with a pair of pliers, I give you this ... one more reason to love Philadelphia. I mean, besides the Rocky statue, and the fact that Eagles fans travel all the way to Tex...
Jean Strahan Is Gettin Paid
If Michael Strahan wants to lose the gap-toothed look he should probably go to the dentist now while he's still insured. Dan Wetzel of Yahoo! Sports(!) has shed some light on the financial terms of the Strahan's highly publicized divorce....
Sergi...NO! (Do You See What I Did There?)
Holy shit. My boy Paddy Harrington did everything he could to hand Sergio Garcia his first Major Championship. He even hit a ball into the burn on the last hole...twice! When Garcia stepped on to the 18th tee he knew he needed par to take home the (Maurice) Claret Jug. You just had to know he'd find...
Tim "Douche" Donaghy Did It and I Called It
The now ex-NBA referee has had a really shitty week, and deservedly so. Just as I predicted Donaghy was identified as the target of the FBI's gambling investigation. While part of me feels for a guy who obviously suffers from a gambling addiction the rest of me is fucking ecstatic. The reason I kept...
What ESPN DOESN'T WANT YOU TO HEAR!
We still haven't watched the ESPYs from Sunday night, because, we dunno, it's the summer, and sometimes we like to pretend that the sun actually exists and will welcome us. From most accounts, though, the show was as tolerable as one could have hoped. We have no major issue with Jimmy Kimmel — not a...
MLB Gets Its Rockwell On
Sure, Major League Baseball might have had a little trouble figuring out that whole steroid issue thing, but it's nice to be made aware that they've got their finger on the pulse of one of the game's most serious problems: Time wasting....
Tank Johnson Is Not Drunk, But Drunk Enough
So, with word coming out that beleaguered Chicago Bear Tank Johnson actually being under the legal limit in his DUI arrest a couple of weeks ago — the one that ultimately forced his release from the Bears — the guy should be out of the woods and all set and good again, right?...
Rod Beck Is Dead At 38
Former Major League closer Rod Beck has passed away at the age of 38. He died yesterday in Phoenix, and the cause of death, at this time, is still unknown. Beck closed for the Giants, Cubs, Red Sox and Padres, and amassed 286 career saves....
And Suddenly That Giant Hog Story Looks So Unimpressive
We like bears. As Robert Klein once said, they are the most helpful of all the animals. "If you have to be stuck in an elevator, it might as well be with a bear. 'Can you reach up there, bear?' 'Well, I think I can try ...' " But when a bear is attacking your six-year-old son, there's only one thing...
What Will Be The Major Sports Story This Time Next Year?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....