wha Page 43 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night ...
• MLB: Cleveland pitched fairly well against Toronto. Except for that one inning. • U-20 Soccer: Never did a Brazilian think USA's kids could beat Brazil's kids, let alone be schooled by a teenager named "Jozy." • Wimbledon: Bartoli upsets Henin. It doesn't say how, so I'll assume she stole her husb...

East Side Little League Will Cap Your Ass
First of all, this is not a hockey post. This Wade Campbell is a Little League dad, who, concerned that his son wasn't getting enough playing time, had a cheerful discussion with his coach. Yes, the term "shot down like a dog" was used, but only in the most constructive of ways....

And Suddenly That Giant Hog Story Looks So Unimpressive
We like bears. As Robert Klein once said, they are the most helpful of all the animals. "If you have to be stuck in an elevator, it might as well be with a bear. 'Can you reach up there, bear?' 'Well, I think I can try ...' " But when a bear is attacking your six-year-old son, there's only one thing...

We Like The Way He Talks And He Likes The Way We Talk, Mmm Hmm
With the news yesterday that running back Quincy Wilson has become the 10th Cincinnati Bengal to be arrested in the past 14 months, we now need the measured, no-nonsense sports commentary of Kige Ramsey more than ever. If you're unfamiliar, just think of him as the Jason Whitlock of Youtube ... if, ...

MLB Reminds You That It Owns The Rights To Richie Sexson's Batting Average
Now that Bud Selig has this steroids problem completely under control, he's turning his lawyers loose on the real enemy: Unlicensed fantasy baseball leagues. We eagerly await the first major enforcement incident. We see police shouting instructions into a house through a bullhorn, followed by a paun...

Sportsline Columnist On Suicide Mission To Fly
So you know those wacky videos they show every year of some Red Bull event where silly folks try to fly their homemade "airplanes" off a 30-foot cliff? (The 10 best crashes are here.) That's called The Flugtag, and this year, Clay Travis, of CBS Sportsline Claynation fame — and our own Tennessee Tit...

Baseball Fans Search For Loopholes On Billy Donovan Night
We are not here to mock you, Billy Donovan. Yes, you backed out of your $27.5 million deal to coach the Orlando Magic; but we feel your pain. Steve Spurrier feels your pain. Homer and Ned feel your pain. And the Fort Myers Miracle minor league baseball team, they ... well, OK, they're here to mock y...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you get home a little bit earlier than anticipated ... • Arena football: Los Angeles at Arizona. Can't wait for this; my hovercraft is full of eels. [ESPN2] • College baseball: NCAA Division I, super regionals, teams TBA, at Wichita. We love college baseball, in a non-professiona...

Ichiro Does Not Think Cleveland Rocks
If it's Monday, it must be time for Ichiro Suzuki Quote Theater. This week's entry concerns the Mariners' makeup game in Cleveland, and Ichiro's clear desire not to be there....

Gilbert Arenas Has A Lot Of Baby Stuff To Buy
The Washington Wizards say that they're not surprised that Agent Zero plans to opt out of the final year of his contract, turning down the team's offer of a three-year extension. Arenas signed a six-year, $65 million deal with the team in 2003, but says that he can make bigger money through free age...

Finally, We Can Love Women's Tennis Once Again (Gurgle) ...
So what, we have freaking robot children now, but we can't invent a female tennis player who is both super smoking hot and amazingly talented? Well that's just a load of ... wait. Ana Ivanovic? Could it be true?...

Do Not Taunt Julian Tavarez
Of all the athletes you'd want to make fun of while he's holding a baseball, Julian Tavarez seems like a particularly dangerous choice....

Three Great Tastes That Taste Great Together
So, you're trying to promote your fledgling soccer franchise. You've got a two options: You can hold a blood drive outside the stadium pregame and give free tickets to those who give up a pint. Or ... you can just GIVE OUT FREE BEER!...

Two Hours In, And We Already Hate Ourselves
We got a late start, so we're only two hours into the great "watch the ESPN family of networks" experiment of 2007. (Though you won't be able to read it until 2008.) So far, we've seen the same "SportsCenter" twice and have marveled at just how handsome Mike Greenberg really is. This is going to be ...

Kobe Bryant, All About The DRAMA
We have a hard time firing ourselves up about front-office intrigue, mainly because it's usually just people posturing about money and "respect" and all kinds of silliness. But we have been enjoying this Kobe Bryant and the Lakers business, if just because it's not every day that a guy who was once ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch WATCHING JOHN RAMBO... • AFL: New Orleans at Philadelphia. Much, much better than the lawnmower races. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees. Some sort of rivalry exists, we read somewhere. [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conference finals, Cleveland at Detroit, Game 1. This just in: LeBron ...

Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...

Son, This Hurts Me More Than It Hurts You
Every new father has had the idea: If I can somehow start training him at birth, I can make my son into a world-class athlete. This tends not to work out well....

Boxing's Last Gasp
Finally, after putting it off for a couple of weeks, we sat down and watched all episodes of "De La Hoya/Mayweather 24/7" last night; enough people had told us we were required to take a look that we sucked it up. And we agree with Robert Weintraub from Slate: It is more fun than anything involving ...

ESPN Trots Out The Barbaro Crazies Again
We have enjoyed, in this week of Barbaro remembrance, the new focus on the kind, not-at-all-unbalanced souls who worship at the altar of the great lost champion, the ones we've been following with somewhat concerned fascination over the last year. Without fail, every reporter who talks to the Dee Mi...