will Page 138 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Look! A Funny Gary Williams Photo!
Apropos of absolutely nothing, here's a rather silly photo of Maryland head basketball coach Gary Williams. Careful with those wings, Coach....
Illini Reunited In ... Utah! Go Jazz!
Forgive us a tiny bit of indulgence here, but our ultimate takeaway from the NBA Draft last evening was not the million Portland trades, Isiah Thomas' fumbling, Dan Patrick and David Stern's pissing contest or even the insane convergence of Michael Jordan and a guy who cries with two second left in ...
Hey, Remember These Guys?
Not to remain so firmly ensconced on the jock of Free Darko, but we're completely fascinated with their McSweeney's column today. Namely: Has anybody noticed that Antoine Walker and Jason Williams are playing in this series? Obviously, Dirk and Shaq and Wade and Cuban are the headliners of the ser...
Listen To Willie: Beware Blasting Caps, Kids!
The fine folks at Zembla have uncovered a rather hilarious old public service annoucement from Willie Mays back in the '60s, where he warns all the kids about the dangers of ... blasting caps....
Ricky's Canadian Debut
Ricky Williams made his Canadian Football League debut last night in a pre-season exhibition game for the Toronto Argonauts. It looks like Ricky's domination of the Canadian game is not a given. He had seven yards on four carries. And I think his numbers get even worse when you consider the exchan...
Where In NYC Is Ricky Williams?
Somewhere in New York City right now, Miami Dolphins running back Ricky Williams is in an office building, appealing his suspension for drug abuse. (Hey ... we're in New York! Is that Ricky over there?) Apparently, they moved the location of the hearing to avoid all the reporters camped out in fro...
Brains! BRAINS!
In case you needed another reason to root against Duke, it appears that Shelden Williams is a zombie. Good news? He's gonna eat that Paulus kid first....
Authors With Pure Hearts: Will Blythe
We've taken some time off from the Authors With Pure Hearts series, but we gleefully return with Will Blythe's To Hate Like This Is To Be Happy Forever, a hysterical, slightly crazed book about what it means to hate so much that it becomes purifying. In the case of Blythe, born and bred in North Car...
The Sex Boat Story Will Never Go Away. Awesome.
Is it possible to ever get tired of the Vikings sex boat story? We think it's not. We're pretty sure, actually....
Ricky Williams Appealing Hot Piss Test
Ricky Williams is reportedly appealing his most recent failed drug test, which if proven true, could end his 2006 season for the Miami Dolphins. Williams previous failed tests were for marijuana but, according to the story, the latest failure was for another illegal substance. The ruling on his ap...
Williams' Career May Have Gone Up In Smoke
Ricky Williams' 2006-07 season has apparently ended before it began, as Denver TV station KDVR reported late Sunday that the Dolphins running back has either failed another drug test, or failed to show up for one. Either would be a violation serious enough for the running back, who has been suspen...
Our Leader's Tropical Vacation: Day 5
As you know, Will Leitch has been on holiday since Thursday — off to the Caribbean, we hear. You may picture him lying oiled and bronzed on a pristine beach, trying to decide between the lobster and the cracked crab. But knowing him as we do, we feel another scenario is far more likely: Sunburned ...
Tracking The NBA's Secret Man
If you're unsure of just how cool this whole Web stuff can be, get over to Henry Abbott's True Hoop and check out how investigative reporting will be done in the future. (And we don't mean "with rocket packs," though that's possible.)...
Culpepper: Lap Dances? Who, Me?
We don't want to overstate — and it probably won't happen, anyway — but if Vikings sex boat gods Daunte Culpepper and Bryant McKinnie get their way, we might be in for the real trial of the century....
The Vikings Meet The Seventh Floor Crew
Sometimes, someone comes up with a concept that's so perfectly in our sweet spot that we can merely stand up and salute, and that's really saying something, because we spend the whole day on our ass....
Your Takes On The Sex Boat Wrapup
We love doing this site, but, to be honest, what we might love the most are you, the readers. Your comments are the highlights of our days, and not just because you're funnier than we are. We thought we'd take this opportunity to showcase our personal favorite slices of hilarity from today's earli...
The Full Report On The Sex Boat
So, hey, anybody else actually dug into these whole Vikings criminal complaints, the ones The Smoking Gun grabbed? If you haven't yet, we suggest you do, because it's even more entertaining than you thought. But, we understand, you're very busy at work today. So allow us to help you out. We've dug...
Watch Your Back In Park City
On the list of Stories We'd Rather Not Report But Have To Anyway, we point out that Utah Jazz point guard — and University of Illinois legend — Deron Williams was arrested (along with another, more anonymous, rookie) over the weekend for giving false information to police. Apparently, there was a ...
Athlete Run-Ins: Cleaning Up Bonds' Mess
For today's final athlete run-in story, we meet former All-Star — and "RBI Baseball" all-world star — Will Clark, who has always been one of our favorites since going crazy for the Cardinals a few years ago and then flat retiring. This one's from Peter in Denver ......
Leaks: Pujols Wins MVP, Finally
Well, today's the day they announced the National League MVP, and you can probably guess which way we're rooting. (We'll give you a hint; it's not the Cub. Or the guy from that Southern team that has no fans.) The vote is expected to be close, but, according to unfortunately named Cardinals blogge...