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Colorado Rockies’ new tech makes buying beer, stealing personal data easier
It’s not enough that Big Tech has our personal information, facial scan, bank records, and thumbprint, but now Amazon wants you to scan your palm in order to expedite the booze-buying process at large events. Colorado Rockies fans can now go to Coors Field, and instead of the lengthy process of show...
A tale of two press conferences
Following WWE’s Clash at the Castle event on Saturday, the company held a press conference in which its lead executive, Paul “Triple H” Levesque, was joined by a number of performers. Speaking first was undisputed champion Roman Reigns, who appeared in character for roughly 90 seconds, delivering hi...
Cale Gundy is the latest example of white America’s obsession with the N-word
For Eve, it was the forbidden fruit. For Cale Gundy, it was the N-word. Entitlement is the downfall of people who aren’t satisfied with having everything....
Signing Andy Goddamn Dalton is the most Bears move ever
Fuck my entire life....
Vernon Maxwell needs to log off, Tony DeAngelo still talking
Vernon Maxwell will forever be remembered as the guy who went into the stands in Portland and punched a guy right in the face....
Jacob Blake Is Why Roger Goodell's Words Are Meaningless
The master of spin is at it again. ...
Bill O’Brien’s Alleged Comments to DeAndre Hopkins Highlight How The Term ‘Baby Mama’ Has Been Associated With Only One Race
Sometimes it’s less about what is said and more about what is implied....
I Followed Grimes's Arcane Training Regimen, Unlocked The Powers Of My Soul, And Cut My Hand
Earlier this week, Grimes, the Canadian pop star who makes pretty good music that sounds like a computer fighting an elf, outlined the parameters of an ambitious training regimen on Instagram Tuesday. The program takes between four to seven hours, requires sword fighting and screaming, and seems to...
Let's Argue About How Much Fancy Williams-Sonoma Lollipops Cost
If I may, I would like to take you Inside The Game. There was a moment during the recording of this podcast—it came maybe two-thirds of the way through the experience of my boss absolutely fucking cleaning my clock at Guess The Price Of This Ridiculous Gilded Kitchen Doodad—when I looked over at Meg...
Melons Are Not Meant To Be Bashed On Your Bro's Abs
A couple of extremely pumped and jacked fitness guys chucked some watermelons at each other, proving that people will do just about anything in the pursuit of rock hard abs and/or more Instagram followers:...
Let's All Laugh At Stephen A. Smith's Pronunciation Of The Word "Memes"
On his radio show the other day, Stephen A. Smith had SOMETHING or OTHER to shout about DEMARCUS Cousins JOINING the WARRIORS when he—aw, hell, just listen to it:...
Baby Will Definitely Grow Up To Be Hoagie-Loving Adult
Philadelphia is already out of control with Super Bowl fever, and this baby is no exception. This kid has likely heard the word “Eagles” 10 million times over the last few weeks, so why wouldn’t his first word be “Eagles”? The only thing that’s surprising is that he didn’t say “Go Birds.”...
I Can Really Identify With These Dads Who Like Swords
Thanks to Brendan Karet and Dave Weigel, the Deadspin staff has spent the last half hour or so watching this video of a husky man in business casual wailing away on some meat, and then following the Youtube rabbit hole down to, uh, more videos of What If Game Of Thrones But Middle Management?...
Premier League To Crack Down On "Intolerable Behaviour" Like Players Swearing At Referees
Citing “intolerable behaviour by players and managers in their competitions [that] have reached unacceptable levels in certain areas,” the Premier League announced Wednesday that referees will “take a stronger position and action towards unacceptable participant conduct” next season....
What You're Doing When You Call My Brother "Retarded"
I have never been a violent person, at least not instinctively. Whenever I was teased as a child—I struggled to read for much of elementary school and wore a lot of white jeans, so I was teased a lot—I’d opt for silence or a quick joke, usually at my own expense. I’d level my aggressor with my appar...
The Case Against Pets
Let’s talk about pets. They are made for cuddling. They nuzzle and purr and wiggle. They show their cute little bellies, asking for scratches. When we’re blue, they bring comfort. When they act like silly imbeciles, we make videos of them and share their antics with strangers on the internet. Pets g...
How To Avoid Getting Hacked Like Laremy Tunsil
Laremy Tunsil might have the distinction of being the only celebrity to claim “I was hacked” without lying, as our own website was quick to note. It’s the quickest, laziest, lamest excuse to toss out after, say, a direct message that wasn’t as direct as expected (see wretched Anthony’s Weiner) or a ...
<i>The Final Girls </i>Is The Nadir Of Meta-Horror, Which Is The Nadir Of Real Horror
If you’re a horror fan, you’ve noticed that every few months, there’s a new entry in the genre that’s explicitly marketed to non-fans, with blogs and critics hyping “your new favorite horror film” and granting best-since-whatever status to a certain kind of movie. Think titles like Tucker & Dale vs....
What If The New <i>Star Wars </i>Sucks, Too?
Last night, the third trailer for the upcoming Star Wars: The Force Awakens premiered on YouTube and ESPN. Did you shit your dick? I definitely shat my dick. I think the dick-shittingest moment, for me, was when the new Darth Vader guy was doing the Force to the other guy’s brain, but the low-altitu...