e Page 8071 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Golden Tate's Dramatic 911 Donut Call: "They're Drunk And Being Retarded"
Listen in as an exasperated donut maker asks police to save her from two buffoons who stole her donuts and her keys. Also: an NFL wideout with "average" build who is "maybe 5'9"? Maybe he needs more than donuts....

Chicago Blackhawks Win The Stanley Cup
It's over. Patrick Kane wins it for the Blackhawks with a "secret" goal in OT. Good for him. (Update: Now with bonus video of Jeremy Roenick's tears.) [NHL.com]...

Did ESPN Photoshop Dwight Gooden's Mug Shot On To A Suit?
Doc Gooden called into the Scott Van Pelt radio show today, but since it is also simulcast on ESPN2, they needed a suitable head shot to show viewers. Or failing that, a police mugshot with a suit painted over it....

Last Call For Hockey? (a.k.a., The Cup Is In The Building)
Wait, a second....sports on NBC....on a school night? My stars! Let's hope it's not the last time. Unless you're a Blackhawks fans, in which, I don't care for your kind. (Why do I say things like?! So rude.)...

Your Marco Scutaro Summer Jam Is Here
"Scuscuscutaro" has dropped and, as far as Phil Collins song parodies about journeymen shortstops go, it's excellent — streets ahead of that Pavement album about Jeff Hornacek. H/T BullfightsOnAcid....

Great Passing Sequence Reminds Everyone That Spain Is Pretty Good At Soccer
Spain defeated Poland in their final World Cup tuneup and the obvious highlight was this stunning series of passes that led to a David Silva goal, which officially put the rest of Group H on pants-crapping notice. [Business Insider]...

Tom Izzo Might Be The New Cavs Coach
Tom Izzo might be telling his MSU players that he intends to take the Cavaliers position; Dick Vitale might be wrong; and any grad students in the 216 might hold off on getting a new cellphone. Your move, Tad Carper. [WFNY]...

Brooke Hundley Sues ESPN
You knew it was coming: Hundley's wrongful termination suit claims ESPN leaked info to the press, and fired her even though Steve Phillips was the one pursuing her. This may not end prettily, but at least it will happen publicly. [PRNewsChannel]...

Austria Bans Zidane Head-Butt Adverts For Promoting Violence
Austrian telly chiefs have pulled a series of adverts showing people imitating Zinedine Zidane's infamous 2006 World Cup final attack on Marco Materazzi, claiming "they convey that violence can be used to solve conflicts"....

Tim Donaghy On Game 3: Just When You Thought It Couldn't Get Worse ...
Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, is reviewing the performance of his former colleagues during the NBA Finals. Here's a quarter-by-quarter breakdown of Game 3, with accompanying video....

US/England Trash Talk Reaches Highest Echelons Of Government
Oh, it is on. The US and UK ambassadors' offices exchanged a great series of letters, making a friendly wager and generally talking shit in advance of Saturday's showdown. Who knew State Department types could be so, well, funny?...


Woody Paige And The Perils Of Public Displays Of Affection
An anonymous reader sent in this photo of Woody Paige goin' around the tongue with a fine lass at the Big Game bar in Denver. Here's the background....

"GAYTR" License Plate Raises Some Questions
An FSU fan seriously committed to the joke? A UF grad who's blissfully unaware? Or just one of the tens of thousands (statistically speaking) of literally gay Florida alumni, and we're just being insensitive jerks? (H/T to commenter chartman1.)...

ESPN Zones To Close, So There's One Less Michelin Three-Star Restaurant In Your Town
Sure you'll still be able to eat overpriced food surrounded by tacky wall decorations. And sure, you'll still be able to watch sports while you drink. But, sadly, it'll be harder to do both at the same time....

More Photos Of Ben Roethlisberger's Night In Milledgeville Released
About 54 cds featuring video interviews will also be released later today by the Georgia Bureau of Investigation. Check out the first 13 photos of Big Ben, Willie Colon and a gaggle of sorority gals hanging out pre-bathroom badness. More later.[TSG]...

Somebody Hit A Drive Off Of Stewart Cink's Crotch
It was at his charity event in Florence, Ala. PGA duffer Zach Johnson confirmed via Twitter that Cink's scrotum was intact after the stunt. [Extra Mustard]...

A Former WFAN Staffer Speaks Out Against Bitchy Interns
We seem to have touched a nerve the last time WFAN came up around these parts, including this missive from a former WFAN staffer. Email after the jump....

Last Night's Winner: Strasburger Entrepreneurs
In sports everyone's a winner, some win better than others. Like the marketing geniuses who quickly pulled together $12 burger platters named after Stephen Strasburg, welcoming the goofy-grinned savior to both Major League Baseball and DC-area stomachs....

Now The Stanley Cup Finals Is For Serious
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....