Arsenal Striker Nicklas Bendtner Rubbed His Dick On A Taxi Tuesday

While Arsenal were in Germany being ousted by FC Bayern in the Champions League on Tuesday, Gunners striker Nicklas Bendtner was getting shithoused in Denmark. He got so smashed, according to reports, that he threatened a cab driver, pulled out his cock, and humped the car. The Telegraph has more:

Danish tabloid BT alleged that Bendtner threatened a taxi driver before unbuttoning his trousers and rubbing himself against the side of the car.

The 26-year-old is then alleged to have whipped the taxi with his belt, calling the driver a "little whore." The cabbie was so concerned that he called the police.

BT quoted the taxi driver as saying: "I've had drunks and alcoholics in my cab in Copenhagen over the last 25 years, but I've never experienced anything like this."

That's pretty awesome. Arsenal, however, are not pleased. He'll likely be fined two weeks' wages,—about £100,000—and he'll have to have a sitdown with Gunners manager Arsène Wenger.

Wenger will ostensibly ream him out...but it's all a sham. Bendtner has been out of favor with Arsenal for years now, and they're releasing him this summer at the end of his contract. In the meantime, he's rarely playing, and didn't even make the travel roster to go to Germany. Neither party wants him at Emirates Stadium, so it's perfectly logical that Bendtner would want to burn Arsenal to the ground, and with his dick.

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[The Telegraph]

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