For months now, we've been trying to figure out why, during our exhibition football game against Andre Rison and Kordell Stewart, Rison felt obliged to hug us. We felt we had competed hard, but not quite worthy of a hug. We thought maybe Andre was just lonely. Maybe he missed Left Eye?

Last year around this time, thanks to a promotion for that "Pros Vs. Joes" show on Spike that no one we know watches, we strapped on a helmet and batted against John Rocker. That trip worked out so well for everybody that they asked us if we'd be interested in heading to Grand Central Station in New York City this…