Stella Artois Is A Disgrace To Belgium

A couple weeks ago, I wrote a big, trashy, sensationalist, and 100-percent accurate post titled "There Is No Excuse For Drinking Heineken," in which I argued that there are literally thousands of better-tasting ways to communicate to the world that you have a dollar more than the price of a Budweiser. I thought that… » 10/29/14 2:49pm Yesterday 2:49pm

Evil Twin Hipster Ale Is Cool, Just Like You

Evil Twin is an interesting operation. In the unlikely event you have any free New York Times articles left on the 28th of a pretty newsy month, you can learn nearly everything I know about that operation here. A quick summary: It's a contract-brewing company run out of Brooklyn by a Danish guy who doesn't get along… » 10/28/14 3:03pm Tuesday 3:03pm

Just How Boozy Should Your Beer Be?

The very convenient truth about beer is that, if used as directed, it will often get you drunk. Thank god. There are so many great things that don't get you drunk: socks, coffee, shuffleboard, you name it; if its name isn't "alcohol," it doesn't get you drunk no matter how otherwise excellent it may be. » 10/27/14 3:02pm Monday 3:02pm

Darren Rovell Is Bad At Beer, Too

ESPN business reporter, kale enthusiast (see above), and staff snitch Darren Rovell likes to tweet about beer sometimes. I don't know if he gets paid for these tweets (I bet he gets paid for these tweets), but regardless, he recently declared Cigar City of Tampa, Fla., to be America's finest brewery. This is not a… » 10/27/14 1:57pm Monday 1:57pm

27 Pumpkin Beers, Ranked

There are two kinds of people: those who embrace Pumpkin-Spice-Everything Season for the miracle that it is, and the godless, gourdless heathens who reject it and live a bland, spiceless life. I fall into the former category, which means it's time to combine two of my favorite activities: drinking pumpkin beers and… » 10/24/14 3:56pm Friday 3:56pm

Texas Should Declare Independence And Make This Their National Beer

Yesterday, one of my idiot friends told me that certain South Floridians have expressed interest in seceding from the rest of the state. Roughly 11 seconds of exhaustive Googling just now failed to turn up much evidence, but let's say it's true. Makes sense. The government's way up north, and apparently run by a… » 10/24/14 1:14pm Friday 1:14pm

Great Divide Oatmeal Yeti Is A Neat, Sweet Beast Indeed

Big, boozy stouts tend to be expensive, and a lot of drinkers regard them as seasonal treats, so they're not among the most popular beers from a straight sales perspective. But if you brew a stout with an alcohol-by-volume percentage over eight and give it a price tag north of $7 per 22-ounce bottle, you've virtually… » 10/23/14 2:19pm 10/23/14 2:19pm

Four Loko Hasn't Killed The Malt Liquor 40 Yet, But Better Drink Fast

While screwing around on Twitter Sunday afternoon, I made the stunning and repulsive discovery that Betspin impresario Jay Sanin is a habitual Four Loko drinker. At first, I thought he just posted this picture as a goof, but further investigation revealed that he is a married man with two dogs, a job, and a roof who… » 10/22/14 2:53pm 10/22/14 2:53pm

All Pumpkin Everything: How Did Fall Turn Into Nutmeg Season?

The list of pumpkin-spiced items to which we are seasonally exposed grows longer every year: Since Starbucks opened the floodgates with the Pumpkin Spice Latte in 2003, we've been enticed, repulsed, and confused by similarly flavored vodka, bagels, yogurt, donuts, oatmeal, M&Ms, etc. And yes, this year they even came… » 10/17/14 2:03pm 10/17/14 2:03pm

Bell's Two-Hearted Ale Is Contrarian-Proof (Dammit)

A couple of my friends recently went to Denver for the Great American Beer Festival, and they stayed out there for at least a week afterward to tour the local breweries, which made me jealous and depressed. Jealous for the obvious reason, and depressed because it forced me to realize that I'll never pull off my book… » 10/16/14 11:29am 10/16/14 11:29am

Bear Republic Hop Rod Rye Is A Rye Beer Worth Fighting For (Or About)

The easiest way to upset a self-identified Beer Geek is to point out the nipple-blood that's soaked through his couple-of-Xs-too-small "Water & Barley & Hops & Yeast" t-shirt. After that, you might as well compound the problem by pointing out that lots of great beers contain all sorts of extra ingredients not found on… » 10/15/14 1:57pm 10/15/14 1:57pm

There Is No Excuse For Drinking Heineken

An editor at a more hopeful outfit recently asked me to write a few paragraphs about the best new beer of 2014. I chose an expensive saison, because that's the kind of thing I like, and he had no problem with the selection, but requested that my article explain why it would appeal "to a Bud Light drinker." I wrote… » 10/14/14 1:36pm 10/14/14 1:36pm

Oskar Blues Old Chub Does Canned Scotch Ale From Colorado Proud

If you want to be taken seriously in the American beer-geek underground, the first thing you've got to do is grow a big, nasty beard. This is a bit of a challenge for the many aspiring beer geeks who happen to be women or unscuzzy men, but rules are rules. I need to see your beard before I can hear your opinions. » 10/13/14 3:47pm 10/13/14 3:47pm

This Is The Best Imported Session Beer

Welcome once again to Drunkspin's Sub-Five-Percent Friday, wherein we recommend a low-potency beer to keep you in the mood but out of trouble. Remember, it's a long weekend, at least as far as the government is concerned, which means court's not open Monday—if you get arrested for something stupid this weekend, you… » 10/10/14 1:54pm 10/10/14 1:54pm

New Glarus Spotted Cow: Overrated Beer From An Underrated State

Wisconsin is a really cool state, and I swear I'm not being a condescending Northeast elitist about it. This isn't like when some loathsome New York City resident praises Chicago as a "nice little town." I don't mean "Wisconsin is really cool, for an upper Midwestern state that Prince isn't from," or "Wisconsin is… » 10/09/14 2:14pm 10/09/14 2:14pm

Flying Dog Raging Bitch: An Offensive Beer In Three Different Ways

The inaugural Drunkspin Daily, a review of Stone Arrogant Bastard, addressed the problem of bad beer names. Too many of them rely on awful puns, weed references, or inside jokes that make it difficult for the consumer to remember which beer's which. Is the unfiltered wheat ale the one named after the brewmaster's… » 10/08/14 2:49pm 10/08/14 2:49pm