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Dumbest Man Alive Gives Dumbest Possible Explanation For Dumb HOF Vote

This year, I decided to make my life a little happier by giving up on my usual winter pastime of hate-reading terrible Hall of Fame columns written by trolls and gibbering nitwits. Stan Keister of the Hackensack Courier-Educator-Herald voted for no one and spent his entire column on the greatness of Jack Morris?… »1/08/15 6:32pm1/08/15 6:32pm

Mike Piazza Is The Only Hall-Of-Fame Question Mark Today

The Hall of Fame voting will be revealed at 2 p.m. EST today. From their showings on the ballots that have been publicly revealed, four players are almost certain to make it in; a whole mess are guaranteed to fall well short. There is only one borderline player, and he'll be the only remaining drama in the official… »1/06/15 10:09am1/06/15 10:09am

Mike Piazza's Book Tour Produced An Excellent Illustration Of The Absurdity Of Steroid Handwringing

Mike Piazza wrote a memoir, and if early releases are any indication, it's mostly about how weird a human being he is. Perhaps because of his eccentric streak, many apparently hoped that the book would be a tell-all about the steroid era, like Jose Canseco's Juiced from someone who isn't (as much of a) national… »2/16/13 11:55am2/16/13 11:55am

Mike Piazza Once Hired A "Karate Guy" To Teach Him How To Beat Up Roger Clemens

After Roger Clemens threw a large part of a shattered bat at Mike Piazza in Game 2 of the 2000 World Series, the Mets catcher's first instinct was to beat him up. Piazza thought better of it, though, for plenty of reasons: It was the first inning of a game in the World Series; Clemens was half-apologizing; if he… »2/12/13 1:15pm2/12/13 1:15pm

Piazza Convinces Publisher That His Life Story Is Entertainingly Heterosexual

One of my good friends from high school had the opportunity to work out with the Dodgers during spring training in the mid-90s. He said the experience in the locker room was memorable because Ramon Martinez swung his penis around like a gangster's pocket watch and that Mike Piazza had the most disgusting back acne… »11/11/08 2:45pm11/11/08 2:45pm