Spring Beers, Ranked

Good news: No matter how you do your seasonal accounting, it's definitely spring now. You're already kinda bored with baseball, you've got mud in previously undiscovered orifices, and your favorite fair-weather hot dog stand will come and go before Dick Vitale screams at you again. Furthermore, I solemnly swear not to… » 4/14/14 12:35pm 4/14/14 12:35pm

Skyline Figures You'd Like Blue Noodles Under Your Diarrhea Sludge

Would you get a load of that horror. I mean lean on in here and get a nice big load of it. That is a pair of tubs of pasta, dyed red and blue by Louisville's Skyline Chili locations as a... what? celebration? like hell! ...of the upcoming Louisville-Kentucky Sweet 16 matchup. Because Skyline Chili figures that if you… » 3/25/14 5:40pm 3/25/14 5:40pm

Irish Beers, Ranked

St. Patrick's Day is tough on a civic-minded, humanist boozebag. I love New Year's Eve and Thanksgiving Morning and Arbor Weekend and all the other "amateur hours" that too many self-proclaimed sophisticates haughtily dismiss, but Paddy's Day comes soaked with complications beyond the rivers of glitter and puke that flow … » 3/14/14 3:00pm 3/14/14 3:00pm

24 Light Beers, Ranked

Raise your hand if you're even fatter now than you were on New Year's Day. No, your other hand, the one that isn't strangling a donut. Oh, I see. Well, do you have a third hand? Never mind, the tear tracks carved through your powdered-sugar beard are affirmation enough. » 2/28/14 2:37pm 2/28/14 2:37pm

Cheap Bourbons, Ranked

Each year around mid-August, publicists start burying everyone in the food journalizing racket with ideas for Thanksgiving coverage. Most of their emails concern ways in which a client, usually a lesser television chef or an agricultural marketing board, can enhance your stuffing with this or that upscale mushroom or… » 11/25/13 3:00pm 11/25/13 3:00pm

Let's Celebrate The Least Efficient Scorer in The Premier League

The chart above shows the Premier Leaguers with the highest ratios of goals to shots on goal this season among those who've both scored and averaged two tries per league game. It seems like the sort of thing you could write quite a lot about, but then the more you think about it, the less clear it is just how much of a … » 11/09/13 9:25am 11/09/13 9:25am