Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

This young fellow you see in front if you is John Burnosky, 96 years old, playing in an oldtimers game with a bunch of whipper-snappin' 60-year-olds. He's played hockey in the minor leagues with Gordie Howe, dove off bridges in Canada, and is in the Guinness Book of World Records.

So now comes the important question. Do we make fun of the old guy for being old? Would we, at 96 years old, have Wilson's Fourteen Points of Gall to take to the ice? Will I, at 96, even be alive to make such a decision? (Why, of course not, bloggers work to the bone and die of heart attacks. All of them.) It's quite the moral dilemma, and either way I'm letting someone down — my elders, or my fellow commenters.


After all, the jokes are right there. Zamboni drivers going remarkably slow with their blinker left on. Having to sit on a phone book in the penalty box. Mumbling nasty things about the referee, that no-good Kraut.

Nah, let's not this time. It doesn't feel right. I'll just sit here quietly, as my paycheck goes toward his social security.

Slapshot Senior [Flint Journal]

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