Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

Angry Man Cuts President Trump's Balls Off

Photo: Snaith Racing

President Trump was getting hard to manage so his handlers went and lopped off his testicles.


The former stallion was gelded Monday at Snaith Racing’s stables in Cape Town, South Africa, after his trainers decided he was too unruly, the Cape Times reported.

“He was truly difficult to train,” trainer Justin Snaith told the newspaper. “All he wanted to do was jump all the fillies.”

He also said: “President Trump was also very vocal and would just not focus on his work. I considered blinkers and a tongue-tie but he was so unmanageable that we had little option but to geld him.”

President Trump is the son of Philanthropist and was bought for $13,740 last year, according to auction records. He is being trained by Snaith Racing, a champion South African brother duo—Justin and Jonathan Snaith—whose website says that they “base their successful formula on ‘a happy horse is a valuable horse.’” Evidently, male horses can still be happy after a veterinarian shears off their nether region, because the Racing Post reported that the drastic strategy worked:

Gelding President Trump seems to have had the desired effect as Snaith reported that, although still “arrogant,” the son of American-bred Philanthropist had settled down and was “doing great.”


So, President Trump won’t be siring any colts or fillies of his own, but—if he’s a really good boy and heeds his trainers and focuses on his work—maybe, just maybe he’ll find himself in a winner’s circle some day.

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