Baseball Page 1305 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jack Clark: Still Hating On The Mets
Back in the days of the old National League East, it was the St. Louis Cardinals that declared themselves mortal enemies of the New York Mets. But even time and realignment can't stop Jack Clark from holding a grudge....

Khalil Greene Not Over Anxiety Problems
Greene—0 for his last 16 AB—is back on the DL with his "social anxiety disorder." Maybe he just needs time to grow a better mullet. [MLB.com]...

Darren Daulton Wants To Makes It Clear That He Has Done A Lot Drugs
Everyone knows Darren Daulton was not a saint and he maybe indulged in some personal excess during his 14 major league seasons, but he just wants assure everyone of the real truth—the man was absolutely full of drugs....

Don't Like Your Starting Pitcher? Sell Him On eBay
His value is estimated at $100,000, so for $.01 on a joke eBay auction, Suppan is a steal. Disclaimer: "No Harms was made to Brewers, Fans, Suppan, Hall and any other animal while making and publishing this add." [HRDerby]...

Tim Lincecum's Haircut Is Now Self-Aware
Randy Johnson has had a tremendous impact on the San Francisco Giants' pitching staff, but not because of his experience and wisdom. It's because he has youngsters like Tim Lincecum believing in the power of the mullet....

Ozzie Guillen Not Helping North-South Side Relations
It's time for another round of every Chicago baseball fan's favorite game, "Guess The Deleted Expletive In Ozzie Guillen's Anti-Cubs Rant." Or for bonus fun, just make up a word and get an even better quote....

The Definition Of A Team Player
Hey, at least they got him Mark DeRosa, right? Maybe someone better hide sharp objects from Leitch anyway....

Marlon Byrd Has Questionable Judgment
Two pieces of surprising news. One, Victor Conte's not in jail! Two, there's still an athlete dumb enough to turn to him for supplements....

This Love Has Taken Its Toll On Me
Red Sox owner John Henry got married yesterday, and held his reception in Fenway's outfield, with the best guest list ever: Larry David, Ken Burns, Alan Dershowitz, the Farrelly Brothers, and Bud Selig. The live band: Maroon 5. [Boston Globe]...

Someone Needs A Refund
Sir Sidney Ponson, in the midst of leading the Dutch Honkball team to the quarterfinals of the WBC, tested positive for Phentermine, a stimulant and appetite suppressant. He's also the reason we invented Deadspin widescreen. [AP]...

Ask J.C. Romero About Steroids At Your Own Peril
Fan asks Phillies for autographs. Phillies walk away. Fan makes a steroid-related crack to J.C. Romero. Romero curses fan, then says, who, me? Fan says, yes, you. Romero allegedly chokes fan. [St. Pete Times]...

Hit Strip Club, Win Lap Dance
It's a good thing the Seattle Post-Intelligencer didn't completely shutter its operations when it stopped the presses, or else there would be only one story about the construction of a strip club by Safeco Field. And who said newspapers weren't egalitarian?...

Milton Bradley Is Uncomfortable, And So Is A Certain Water Cooler
Lou Piniella, Milton Bradley and a water cooler — not as sexy a ménage à trois as it sounds. And unfortunately, it turns out the water cooler is the Lucky Pierre in this uninviting threesome....

Well, That Doesn't Add Up
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Lou Piniella Adds Context To The Soto Stoner Saga
"Look, I have smoked dope one time in my life, and it didn't do a damn thing for me, and I never tried it again.... But a lot of people do (smoke marijuana). You can buy it in California from a pharmacy." [ChiTrib]...

Braves Reliever Breaks Hand On Door, Pops Bone Back In, Pitches 7th, Needs Surgery, Apologizes
"I'm ashamed of myself.This is a professional sport; you handle yourself in a professional manner. I didn't do that. … I'm just hopeful that Bobby and Frank will give me another chance." [SBB/AJC]...

Angles In The Outfield
Slate answers the question we've all asked at one time or another, often while watching those games on television in which Larry Vanover seems to have a mail slot for a strike zone. What's with baseball's crappy camera angles? [Slate]...

Donald Fehr: Unconscionable Villain ... For Being Good At His Job
Donald Fehr ran baseball's players union in an ever more open-shop America and in a sports culture beset by drug panics of one kind or another. The former ensured that he'd be unappreciated; the latter that he'd be vilified....

Magglio Ordonez Loses His Magically Silky Hair
After being benched for terribleness, the Tigers "slugger" has shorn his legendary flowing locks. (You can maybe buy them on eBay.) So did it have the intended Reverse Samson effect? Two-for-four! Against the Cubs? Ok, that's inconclusive evidence. [Detroit4Lyfe]...
