Baseball Page 1329 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Longoria Studly, But Rays' Division Push Still Needs More Cowbell
It's getting more and more annoying to attend a game at Tropicana Field. The guy sitting to your right is wearing a mohawk. And the guy to your left is banging a cowbell. What happened to simply wearing a cap and keeping a scorecard? Evan Longoria walloped three homers on Thursday but it wasn't enou...

George Brett Would Like To Tell You About That Time He Pooped His Pants
Not sure which spring training this video is from, but the video was just released to an unsuspecting public on Thursday, and is destined to go down as a classic; watch now as Royals Hall of Famer George Brett regales a teammate about the many times he's shit his pants. Seriously; Brett goes into gr...

Possibly The Most Disturbing Baseball Hazing Photo You'll Ever See
This baseball hazing thing officially went too far on Wednesday, when San Diego Padres rookies were forced to dress as Hooters waitresses; with one there on the right completing the ensemble with fake breasts. God, I hope those are fake. Won't somebody think of the children??! So can anyone provide ...

Cubs Chase Old Man Off Their Lawn
Awhile ago we told you the story of Leo Hildebrand, the 104-year-old Cubs fan whose one big wish was to throw out the first pitch for a game at Wrigley Field. Of course he'd probably need a relay man, and a diaper change to complete the task. But still, how could the Cubs deny the only person in Chi...

Could There Be A More Fitting Metaphor For The AL East Race?
Don't tase Boston's divisional title chances, bro! If this isn't a sign from the baseball gods that the race is over in the East, I don't know what is. This Red Sox fan tried to leap the dugout and run onto the field at the Trop on Wednesday, but was met with Epic Failure: security grabbed him, and ...

Who Is The Mystery Back-To-Back Homer Guy?
Eat your heart out, Zack Hample. I think it's safe to say that this unknown lad will be the only fan in the history of the old Yankee Stadium to catch home run balls on consecutive nights. Yes Network TV guys Michael Kay and Ken Singleton (I think) are all over the story, with video of the same fan ...

Big Papi's Bed Will End Homelessness, Achieve Peace In The Middle East
I have always dreamed of sleeping in Big Papi's bed, but until now I never thought that it could become a reality. Now it's here; the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to own Big Papi's bed. I don't know for sure, but I imagine that sleeping there would be like nestling into a warm, comforting hug by t...

We're Collecting Your Yankee Stadium Stories
As you know, the final homestand ever in old Yankee Stadium began Saturday, as the team moves to a larger space next door — with unobstructed views from most seats! — in 2009. There have been several tributes already, and Bugs and Cranks came out with an anti-tribute today. But I'm sure that Deadspi...

Eric Byrnes and Conor Jackson ... They're Cops!
The Diamondbacks are still working hard to market Eric Byrnes as the funny, freewheeling surfer dude who just happens to play baseball for $10 mil a year. Thus we have The Eric Byrnes Show, which is carried on FSN Arizona. A recent promotion for the show proves that it may be more entertaining than ...

Mock The Mohawk At Your Own Peril
Silly? Yes; especially when you consider that manager Joe Maddon is wearing one. But the Rays' new mohawk look seems to have mystical powers; a force that the Boston Red Sox were not able to overcome on Tuesday. The Rays broke free from a virtual tie with Boston atop the standings with a 2-1 win at ...

Time To Check In On Everyone's Favorite New York Baseball Feud
Two reasons that the Yankees-Red Sox playoff brawl of 2003 may have been the best baseball fight of all time: 1. Don Zimmer body-slam goodness, and how often do you see that? And 2., we continue to reap fantastic quotes, even five years later. In an interview with Michael Kay for the YES Network pro...

Chris Berman; Friend And Inspiration To Young Aspiring Journalists
Good interview over at the Uniwatch blog with Tyler Kepner, the Yankees beat writer for the New York Times. In it Kepner tells the story of when, as a kid, he produced a handwritten baseball magazine that ended up gaining a readership that included people such as George Vescey, Bob Costas and Jayson...

Universe Rights Itself, Soon Should Be Completely Normal
Like in the Michael Douglas film Falling Down, Joe Maddon is wearing a short-sleeved dress shirt and demanding breakfast at McDonald's, even though its past 11:30. Sorry Joe. We're back where we were in July 24; the Red Sox and Rays, tied for first in the East. Only this time Boston clearly has mome...

Cubs Leave The Mark Of The Z
What they're saying, blog-wise, about Carlos Zambrano's no-hitter vs. the Astros on Sunday ... • The Most Interesting Man In The World On Hits. No. With the city in ruins, their billionaire idiot owner was finally convinced to move the games somewhere else. But with that same hurricane dumping rain ...

Carlos Zambrano Mows Your Hitters Down
A game that was merely a whisper this morning has turned into a primal scream from the massive Cubs ace, Carlos Zambrano. Awash in a sea of Cubs blue at Miller Park in Milwaukee, Zambrano roared back tonight from a forced vacation due to rotator cuff soreness and an August well under his best to sec...

Jessica Simpson Entertains Phoenix Baseball Fans, Car Wreck Aficionados
We may have had a bit of fun in our last visit with the notion that Jessica Simpson's opening act is Randy Johnson. However, we felt that perhaps we hadn't given the matter the proper respect it deserves. After all, a number of important and wealthy people knowledgeable about their industries determ...

Ike Wreaks Havoc With Baseball Playoff Races, Scheduling
The NFL isn’t the only league effected by that bastard Ike as the Astros and Major League Baseball have agreed to move two of Houston’s canceled home games that were scheduled against the Cubs this weekend to a “neutral” site in Milwaukee. Eddie Wade’s Astros have been on fire over the past three we...

MLB Closer: Okay, Lord... Me and You, Right?
Six games didn't get off the ground without the assistance of rising tides today, thanks to enough moisture across these United States to make you think Tammy Faye Bakker herself had been disinterred by her own post-mortem weeping. Division races from the AL Central to the NL Central (oh, and the ...

Shea Stadium Is Going Out Of Business; Everything Must Go!
Not since Cosmo Kramer fished the entire Merv Griffin talk show set out of a dumpster has there been a bigger opportunity than this: The Shea Stadium Memorabilia Auction. I know you've always wanted your very own Mets dugout, and now is your chance: Starting bid $100,000. How about Moises Alou's loc...

Francisco Rodriguez Partakes In A Moment Of Quiet Reflection
One day after the Angels broke the record for earliest clinching of the AL West, reliever Francisco Rodriguez started the real celebration. F-Rod earned his 57th save in LA's 7-4 win over the Mariners, tying the major league record set by Bobby Thigpen of the Chicago White Sox in 1990. By all accoun...