Caption Contest: What Is Roger Goodell Saying To This Child?

Roger Goodell and the NFL PR apparatus stopped by Ariel Community Academy in Chicago today, launching something called the Character Playbook, a Chrome browser extension that tells you how to hide the symptoms of a traumatic brain injury, probably. Who knows.

In any case, it gave us the above photo, from NFL PR guy @NFLPRguy’s Twitter feed, of a safety-cone-orange Goodell leaning in for a chat with one of the kids. And it got me wondering: What in the damn hell could Roger Goodell be saying to this unfortunate child? Is it about “character”? The importance of not eating pizza until the boss eats pizza?

So here’s the challenge: Caption this photo, down in the discussion section below. We’ll promote our favorites. Winner gets, uh, some shit off somebody’s desk, maybe?