Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Everybody Loves Kurt Warner...Except One Former California Pizza Kitchen Employee

Illustration for article titled Everybody Loves Kurt Warner...Except One Former California Pizza Kitchen Employee

Kurt Warner just can't stop winning over NFL fans with his sage quarterbacking and stock boy humbleness, so even if he doesn't make it to Canton we can all agree he's an exceptional human being, right? Behold a dissenter.


According to Something Called "Hanna Hercules", requisite female sidekick of a St.Louis mid-day radio program called "Nick and The Badger," Kurt Warner is not the automatic first ballot Hall of Fame human being everyone says he is. Here's her tale, transcribed from this audio segment, about how Brenda and Kurt Warner scarred her for life :

" I had a personal experience with Kurt Warner, as a matter of fact. When he was playing for the Rams, I was working at California Pizza Kitchen at Chesterfield Mall and he called in under the name Dave Carney (sp/sic'd) and ordered about — I kid you not — 20 pizzas and he couldn't figure out the last one and I was, like, 'Sir, you're more than welcome to take your time, gimme a call back, I'm gonna hold this order here until you complete it so all of your pizzas are ready at once.' About 25 minutes later, his wife Brenda shows up, looking for all these pizzas and I was like, 'Are you Dave Carney? Is that your order?' and she's like 'Yes!' And I was, like, you guys never called back to finish your order for your final pizza...They tried to get me fired and were almost successful in doing it. He actually came in and was (angry voice) "Do you know who I am?! And I was 15-years-old! Just a little hostess..."

Well, Nick, The Badger and whatever other animal-nicknamed people in the studio were stunned by this story, but Hanna assured them it did happen and it was, in fact, Brenda and Kurt Warner and not look-a-likes with the last name Carney.

For all you know, that was God's pizza, Hanna. Did anyone else come into the California Pizza Kitchen that night with the Warners/Carneys who looked like this? If so, you're so going hell.